What to do when your husband does not love you anymore?

Answer 1

The best way to get it back is to start doing some of the things you used to do when you were in love. Kiss, hug, go on picnics, have fun, cuddle, take a class together, etc. Turn off the computer, TV, phone, blackberry, etc. Kiss and hug goodbye in the morning. In marriage, we tend to get caught up in the day-to-dayness and need to regroup and reattach periodically. The longer the marriage, the better the next passage is.

This truly is a question that your husband has the answer to. However, I will tell you that the feelings everyone has in the beginning of a relationship do not stay the same. Actually, they can become stronger. IT TAKES WORK!!! In every aspect of the word WORK. It's like a seed. It will only grow and produce if you put alot of time and effort and nurturing into it. Or it will wither and never produce to its fullest potential.

Ask him why did he fall in love with you at the first place? And what are the things he is missing from the past? Find something you are both intereted in doing, e.g. cooking, sports, traveling. Watching TV doesn't count.

If he does not have the desire, then you are only going to be more hurt in the long run. You cannot force love. but there may be a reason why he is feeling this way , could he be mistaking comfortable for boring ?? easy to remedy .. talk with him and let him ask questions , he may be feeling his age or it may be something else .

He's letting you know he's possibly wanting a divorce or he has someone that he is interested in, OR, he has already started something with another.

look he doesn't kmow wut his missing, but u have to keep in mind that maybe he's just scared that you may not have the same feelings for him. Give him a little time he'll com around and if he doesnt then talk to him and maybe.......u might wanna talk about him giving u a little time for ur self and both of u can figure out ur feelings for each other. GOOD LUCK!

From a husband's perspectiveI am a husband, and I have the exact same feelings. In fact, I couldn't remember why I got married in the first place. I know this may sound crude, but I do not know what I want now as well. I am completely lost. I can only vaguely remember how electricfying our first kiss and hands-holding were. That was it. Somehow, we just drifted apart after 9 years together, and 5 years being married. I would like to rekindle the flame, but nothing seems to work.

From a counselor's perspective

When you have a new car don't you polish it every week? No, you don't? When you have a new diamond ring don't you show it off every possible moment? Well, maybe not after a while! Things wear. They're not so new after a while. Just like things, feelings change. Are there any solutions? Yes, of course, but they aren't easy. Let me give you just a few that will awaken new feelings, less fervent feelings but more sustainable ones: ask your spouse about work or, with a stay-at-home wife about her day when you come home. Go out to dinner at least once a week - even if only to McDonald - and have a personal conversation about the week's happenings. Once in a while, touch your spouse gently, no more than a touch on the cheek. More than anything, by asking about your spouse's life and showing some tenderness, you will let him or her know that you care.

Yes, of course, feelings change. I only scratched the surface. We all get irritated when we live with someone for years.

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When a spouse tells you that they are "no longer happy", " love you but not In Love with you", etc... is a sign that they may be considering or having an affair.

The best way to deal is to keep trying for a few more months and if that doesnt work go ahead and let him divorce you.

Answer 2

Ask him why? And what is missing from the relationship? Ask first maybe what where the qulities and things that made him fall in love with you. And than maybe by his answers you will understand or see that he is a different person now or has changed. A person can't make people love them. I would let him go. Or maybe It's comunacation but, if a person say's " I don't love you" Don't wast your time on them and find someone that does love you. Best of luck in love.

Answer 3

I think you should ask him to give you an HONESTanswer as to why it is that way. If it is a situation where you can't ask the question without creating an argument or fight then try making some adjustments in how you are doing things at home and even attention toward him. In doing this somewhere in there you'll be able to drop the question; "What is going on with our love for each other"... I wish you the best

Answer 4

The person that has made the statement of not loving their partner truly feels this way or, they could be simply angry and frustrated. There are many reasons: Why the person may make this statement: * They mean what they say. It could be another woman he is having an affair with or, there may not be a woman at all and he is just frustrated with a bad relationship. * He could say this in the heat of anger so it's to one's advantage to try and sit down like two adults and communicate and either decide to work on the relationship or breakup. * If the person is depressed, using street drugs or has a problem with alcohol they can often say things they don't mean. * Depression can cause a person to become frustrated, angry and make rash decisions. * Men in 'Andropause' (can start from 40 years and up) which is a form of Menopause, but fewer side effects than what women go through. Andropause can cause moodiness in men as well as hot flashes and anger outbursts. The male in question generally begins to reflect back on their life and may feel they have not accomplished everything in life they wish they had and of course there is always trying to recapture that youth. Like women, men often feel they want to be recognized by other women as being attractive. * Certain medications can often cause personality changes. If your spouse is on medications please look up the side effects on the internet. What you can do: * Try sitting down with your spouse and start communicating. Ask him why he doesn't love you any longer and whatever did you do to cause this reaction. Sometimes a couple just falls out of love. You basically want to know the reason behind his remark. * If he refuses to communicate and is still telling you he doesn't love you then pack his bags and have them sitting at the front door and tell him he'll be hearing from your lawyer. If you feel there is any hope for your relationship then you can go for a 'separation' and not a divorce. Perhaps distance will make the heart grow fonder. * Remind yourself that you are stronger than you think. Let him know you aren't putting up with what he has said and will follow through on seeing a lawyer. Don't beg or plead with him and be strong even though your heart is breaking. If there is another woman involved don't lower yourself by calling her names. This will only enrage him more. * If there is a home, children, properties or business you have together then the lawyer will deal with that as far as custody of any children and how the properties and monies are divided. * If it comes down to splitting up then wait six months to a year and if your partner shows no signs of coming back then file for divorce. A woman is at her strongest when she can honestly say she doesn't need a man to survive in this world and that's when you'll have a strong relationship. Don't believe that because your partner leaves you that you are not worthy of a future relationship because you are!

Answer 5

What would make you think that your husband no longer loves you? Has he said it? Or is it just something that you feel? Is there simply a distance between you that you cannot seem to close the gap on?

Unfortunately, you cannot change what he does. But you CAN change your own behaviors. Sometimes a man can just feel unappreciated, unloved, unnoticed... any number of things that women often feel as well. At one point when marriage wasn't doing so well, I decided to change it by doing what I could from my end. I encourage my husband. To be honest, I didn't think it would make much difference, but I had to try. I completed the first day's challenge and my husband's response was AMAZING! Every day that I completed the day's challenge brought us that much closer together! It was honestly the turning point in my marriage. I urge you to give it a try!

Answer 6

You didn't make it clear if he was talking about himself or he didn't feel the same towards you. From 40 plus men can go through 'Andropause' which is lesser in degree, but similar to women's Menopause. They DO have hot flashes, mood swings, can perspire more than usual, depression and yearn for their youth and regaining it. Not all men go through this, but a good percentage of them do. Please sit down with your husband and communicate with him. Ask him to explain to you what he means. He could well feel depressed and that his life is not fulfilled and he's edgy and frustrated about it, or he feels there are too many problems in the marriage and may want out of the marriage. By communicating this gives you the chance to let him know your feelings as well and to try and work things out and if he's not willing to do so then it also gives you the upper hand to ask him for at least a separation. In some cases a separation is best so that each of you can have 'head space' and you might both surprise yourselves and miss each other a great deal. No one said that life in general was a rose garden and marriage certainly isn't either. There are those prickly thorns we all have to get past.

Answer 7

• The only thing you can do is try and communicate further with your husband and ask him why he doesn't feel the same about you any longer. The lack of communication is what causes most of the problems between couples and in the world in general. As much as it may hurt you ask him if he is hinting for a divorce and go from there. Couples often change through their years and feel penned up or want to regain their youth before they get too old. Men from 40 on can go through Andropause which is similar, but not as difficult as women going through menopause and it is during this time some men will feel they have to act now to change their lifestyle if they want to reach back into their youth and know that other women are attracted to him. He may sway and move on, but generally these men find that the grass is not always greener on the other side of the fence. Take the control from him and let him know you will not put up with giving up on your marriage so quickly and perhaps decide on a separation instead of an immediate divorce. This will give him a chance to think things out and you may be surprised to learn how independent you are and may not want him back in the end.

Answer 8

That means he has another woman in his life....so you gotta move on...