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Get the best lawyer you can and hope for the best. Make sure that the agreement leaves you fully financially independent (except perhaps for child support or alimony). Do not trust him to refinance the house in his name-or to pay the mortgage--or to give your your share of proceeds from a house sale or tax return-- pay off a car or anything else you have in common. Every one of those issues should be supervised by your attorney and included in the Separation Agreement. Close all credit cards--if they have outstanding balances, include that in the agreement.

Hold off on the divorce until you have ten years if it is close to coming up (Social Security). If you have kids, insist that he maintain a life insurance policy with you as beneficiary and health insurance for them. Say no to having to live with children within a certain area if you get custody. Make sure everything is in writing or don't sign--you want to eliminate as many avenues as possible where he might affect your moving on. (in my time, the financial independence really paid off in keeping things simple).

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12y ago

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