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If you are thinking that strong personal boundaries will discourage your narcissist then you are only kidding yourself. Narcissistic people are ego-maniacal, selfish, self absorbed, feel they are above average in intelligence and smarter than most around them and that includes their coworkers (of course this is in their own minds in most cases.) Narcissists can be perfectionists, moody and short on patience. You can argue with them, but you are feeding into what they want. You can set boundaries, but they are adept at breaking boundaries in most aspects of their lives and love the doing it because it fuels their ego and in their own mind makes them more powerful. SHOOT FROM THE HIP! Tell them to seek help or you're out of there! The stats are very low that Narcissists every seek counseling because they believe they have all the answers to everything and will even consider the counselor not worthy of the Narcissists so-called higher intellectual level. My suggestion .... run while you can! =reply to your answer= Actually, what I am after is how to avoid narcissists in the first place! I keep hearing about "boundaries" and how these seem to be compromised in these relationships, with respect to the victim, whom may become too complacent, forgiving and accommodations of the narcissists behavior. Late in my relationship with my own narcissist (under the advice of a therapist) I did adapt some techniques to incorporate stronger personal boundaries. Shortly thereafter, our relationship ended. He seemed suddenly to become bored with me,picked a ridiculous fight which ended in me throwing him out. I do not make light of this. The whole relationship has been extremely trying and I still struggle in coming to terms with it. I am trying for myself to understand how I may avoid such a person in the future. Are boundaries the key? When each of us chooses someone in hopes of having a future with them it's a gamble. Narcissists and mental/physical abusers are chameleons and hide their traits very well. The only thing one can do is date them for at least a year because even chameleons can's hide forever. Please go onto: www.Google.com TYPE IN: WHAT ARE THE TRAITS OF A NARCISSIST You will find lots of information and hopefully you will have some guide-lines to go by. Good luck

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