What should you do if your best friend starts hanging out with a bully?

Answer 1

What a great opportunity for the 3 or more of you to become good friends together and renew the relationship with your former best friend. This is a great time for you to grow personally and become the better person, by accepting them both and enjoy what they bring to the relationships. You must have something in common with both of them because you were best friends before. Let go of all the old animosities, smile, include them both in your activities and just enjoy who they are. They will both look up to you and see you as their "leader", because of your maturity.

BUTT if this was a toxic friend or you choose to end the friendship:

DONT let her join. Dont let her steal YOUR best friend. He/she is yours and not hers. She/he is probably just out for revenge.

My story:

I had alot of friends, a group and i was pretty much friends with everyone. That is until she came allong. lets call her ToxicD. Toxic D was in choir class with me and so we started becoming friends. She told me she was sick of her old friend, and so she became mine. She told me that my old group of friends were "so uncool" and that "I cant afford to be seen with those losers". She would make me very unhappy and I would feel bad if something good happened to me. Others hated her and they would tell me she was just using me but I wouldn't listen. She would invite herself over and I would have to buy her things. It got to the point where she would say "I am free today" and it was expected that I would ask her over. Ofcourse my parents noticed nothing. She would try on my clothes, especially from brands like Abercrombie and hollister. And she would say "That suits me much better than you, can i have it?" I was so angry I got rid of her. How? I just ignored her. I knew that if I would have to discuss it with her i would SNAP and honestly murder her. I thougt she took the hint but then I was called to the counceler for 'bullying her' and he told us how we should be friends again. Ofcourse I did not tell them what was going on because to many swearwords would have been involved. People hated me when I was friends again but the day our friendship ended people liked me again. At the worldfest, a party celebrating all nations that we celebrate at our school, her mom was literally waiting at the entrance for me. She said :

"I can't believe what you've done. It hurt her feelings. She's sad!" And that is when I had it once and for all. These people were just so extremely selfish only caring about themselves and their feelings. But enough of that, because I could go on for years.

She would lone around or hang out with my used to be friends that she had said were "total losers and that she cant be seen with". And yet, she thought she was too cool for them and would lone around. They felt bad but I told them what she had siad about them. The thing about toxic D is that she doesnt ever want to fight or be seen alone. So now I found these really awesome friends. Lets ccal lthe the RMARKAs (the letters of their first names). R- amazingly nice to EVERYONE M- awesome but picky with friends A- loves the world but not when you are mean to others R- just Really nice K- amazing A- moody and yet loveable

So A, the one that loves the world, was in the swim team with toxic D. I didn't forbid my friends to be friends with toxic D but they knew how bad she was. But toxic D promised A that she would changed and told her how I had bullied her and how others had bulllied her. this is not true. I only ignored her because if I would have spoken with her I would have beaten her up, a wise choice no? But toxic D turned it all around. There was a jacket incident were someone had drewn over her white Jacket with permanent red marker but she got it all out. She was just using this 'bulllying' to wap A around her finger and to get her parents to buy her more abercrombie. Later D had lied to A that the jacket had been from her dead grandma (one died 10 years ago, the other is alove) and the jacket fit so it coulndt have been from the other one who she told me she had never known. So A has invited her to sit with us. The first time she did she left. I was really angry because I bet her stupid mom told her to hang around agian because no one else liked her, they knew her toxic side. Toxic D would keep sitting with us she still does. But I know that she only wants to use evryone. People like her dont change. And even if they try, which, trust me, they dont, they cant! So I will get rid of her. I have a plan but I will explain the situation a bit more:

So A has a great friend named R, the really nice one. As you know, toxic D just loves to destroy old friendships, that is what she is doing to R. She doesnt sit with us anymore and A keeps dithching her for D. So I will save Rs friendship and get D back once and for all. You may think this is just bitter hatred but it is simply trying to help R and get D to realize that she can't keep living this way. You must know, she never thinks anything is her fault and is extremely lazy and unreliable.

So my plan:

small things like:

-only talk to her when absolutely necessary

-I am in he advisory (morning informatics) where I will not sit with her

-don't talk to her

-stay out of her way

-when she eats with us, get as far away as possible

- don't let anyone think we are friends

-ignore her but not infront of A as she will think it is bullying

- don't go to far, bullyong won't work, it will just get you in trouble, trust me

so If you have classes with this person than do small things to distance yourself from them like I have done above.

The Big plan:

So if toxic D can invite herself along why can't I invite R? Sure, we aren't the closest friends but I think she will catch on. Toxic D really dislikes R and if she shows the dislike infront of A, A will be annoyed. But she will not want to be friends with R and will probably give up. She will know that If she is going to hang around so is R. I will be a really good friend to R because I know what its like and I will not just use her for the plan,bnut actaully be there for her. I will tell M about it. M can't keep a secret. especially if you tell her so she will tell all girls. They will know we aren't friends and so will keep dissincluding toxic D. This sounds likebullying but it isn't . It is just so that she learns her lesson and ignoring isn't bullying is it?

And since when are you not alloud to inlude R?

And it isn't my fault that M can't keep things to herself...

You can make a plan, it doesn't have to be this harsh, it can just be small things, but don't let ex-best friends ruin the rest of your happiness

If they finished with you- They thought they were to good. No one else wants them and he/she blames it on you. THey have come bakc to steal away your friends

You finished with them- there must have been a reason. Keep that in mind and remeber that people, especially toxic ones, don't change. NEVER

It is more important to have just 1 friend who is a true friend than hundreds who are toxic and fakes. Keep that in mind!

And D, if you are reading this, and you know it's you then you shouold just know that the reason I ignored you is because you were so toxic and you dissaproved of my real friends, used me, and weren't ever happy for me. It was a one-profit relationship and I am glad it was over. If you want to be friends with A, fine, but don't ruin everyone elses life by ruining As life like you ruined mine.

And just so you know who you are Diana, you should know that A stands for Annica and this is Alexis. So don't try to break up Rihannons friendship with Annica just because you don't want to be a loner, there is a reason why people stay out of your way.

If you want to be friends with your ex go ahead. There might have just been a missunderstanding but if it is a toxic x, be warned, it is just revenge so you should show him/her that you know what they are up to and don't accept it. Tell your friends.

Just keep in mind that true friends will always be at your side, no matter what a toxic prson tells them so don't be worried if you think that the toxic person will tell lies to seperate you, your friends know better!

Hope it helped, I will let you know if the plan is working when it does, so soon!

Answer 2

Stay friends with them...

You just need to tell your friend how it is. Tell them how much of a... the bully is. Can't swear, but you get the idea.

When I was in school, I was friends with people who sometimes did pick on people, and I'd always tell them to stop. However it's different if it's a bit of banter, don't confuse this.