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In both the American Revolutionary War and the US Civil War, women were legally barred from participating. However, some women did want to fight as soldiers. The government only permitted women to be nurses.

Otherwise, women were in a uniquely pained position. They had to resign themselves to their husbands and sons going off to war. In addition, sorrows mounted because families were often split up, with father and sons fighting each other and brother fighting against brother. "North" - "South" distinctions were not some set location, but more, where the heart resided. So a son might fight against people like his slave-owner parents in the South, though the son never lived in the North.

Women had to bury their husbands and sons. Others had to go on when their husbands ran away after the Civil War.

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