Araneus diadematus(AKA cross spider) is the only spider i can think of that i know of that is brown/black and has a cross on its back. Here are some photos. http://www.nicksspiders.com/nicksspiders/araneusdiadematus.htm
The spider you are describing could possibly be the gray cross spider (Larinioides sclopetarius). This spider is commonly found in wooded areas in Michigan and has a white spot on its back. It is known for its hairy body and is relatively harmless to humans.
Spider ants are a type of ant species that typically have elongated bodies with long, slender legs. They are known for their unique appearance that resembles a cross between an ant and a spider, hence the name "spider ant." These ants are often found in tropical regions and exhibit interesting behaviors such as foraging and communicating through vibrations.
Is it a white orb? In that case it would be an egg sack. If it is actually a white spot it cold be a wolf spider. I am sure another user could provide a more detailed answer but I have seen wolf spiders with white spots.
The spider you are referring to is likely the black widow spider. The female black widow has a distinct red hourglass shape or white crescent on its abdomen. They are known for their venomous bite, so caution should be taken when encountering them.
a spider known as a cross spider usaually found in the uk
Have seen a very small spider with 4 white dots and 1 red dot. Not a red back. Ta ~Snaff
your mummy spider
Your spider is a Heartstring spider the prettiest spider ever.
They're hybrids: they're cross between a tiger and a spider, they're half tiger and half spider
a spider.
Could be a Black and Yellow garden spider, common the US west coast.
Araneus diadematus(AKA cross spider) is the only spider i can think of that i know of that is brown/black and has a cross on its back. Here are some photos. http://www.nicksspiders.com/nicksspiders/araneusdiadematus.htm
tarantuela
It MIGHT be the St Andrews Cross Spider. Their bite is at low risk to humans and they are not aggressive.
A spider-wolf.
The answer to the joke is Spider monkey.