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Do women stay in abusive relationships because of a fear of being alone?
- Women stay in abusive relationships for a variety of reasons, it is never that simple. They may believe that they can work through issues with their partner and the abuse will diminish. It is never easy to leave someone when the heart is entangled, just because there is abuse doesn't mean there is not love. There may be a fear of being 'alone', but it is not usually just that that keeps them. Victims of abuse often suffer from high levels of insecurity and low self-confidence which makes it easy for them to be convinced by the abuser that they are at fault for their abusive behaviour. So, often the woman may feel that if she changes her behaviour then the abuse will stop. It can become a cycle that becomes more and more abusive over time and leaves the woman feeling so hopeless that she begins to accept her partners abusive behaviour.
- Yes, and it also depends on the culture of the woman. In some culture women are not "allowed" or afraid to leave, it could be so that they don't bring shame to their family...a lot of times they stay for "the kids" not realizing that they do more harm to their children when they stay in an abusive relationship. Abusers also chose women that have issues, like insecurity thus making it easier for them to control the victim. Also, in this day in age, the victim is no longer just a woman, it can be a man, in the gay/lesbian community, transgender community. Rich or poor, educated or not, violence exists and I think the cycle can be broken if the children can be taken out of the violent situation in time so that their generation has a chance to make better choices and live different lives.
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Most women who become involved with abusers were raised in abusivehouseholds -- as were practically all abusers -- and thus find the non-abusive aspects of an abuser's person…ality familiar andattractive. That is often because they unconsciously seek a personsimilar to one in their past in order to complete a "good"relationship. Then, as the relationship develops, both fall backinto their old patterns. That is also why children of alcoholicsoften marry future alcoholics. Therapists call it "speaking thesame language." Answer2: Unfortunately and not surprisingly, some grow up inhostile surroundings where emotional and physical violence were anormal part of everyday life.
Here are some of the most common reasons. 1. Because they fear what will happen if or when they leave theabusive other. 2. Because they believe that in time that person will… change andthings will get better. 3. They think that something is wrong with themselves and that ifthey change things will get better that way. 4. They think that the person who abuses them just loves them alotand don't really mean to do any harm they just cant help it. The fact is if they truly love you they will get help forthemselves and make themselves better for you. Theres nothing wrongwith you its him or in some cases her. Something you could do ifyou want them to change is bring a friend over that you can staywith. The three of you sit down and talk, tell him/her what needsto change if he/she really wants to be with you then they willchange. Then leave and go stay with that friend. Him/her sayingthey have changed and coming to you and saying this 3 days fromwhen you left is false. They cant change that quick. Make them goto counciling and make sure you know they went. Talk to thecouncilor and see if he/she has made any progress. There no trueway to tell if they have changed or not until you give them asecond chance. Some people just arnt willing to take that risk.Because to be honest there is always the chance , that when you goback it gets worse because of what you did. There is also thechance that he/she has changed and it is going to be really good.Its a 70/30. . . . .good luck! Answer2: Why are so many women locked into such dangerousrelationships? Many people wonder: Why don't they seek help? Whydon't they leave? The answer, in most cases, is fear. Fear has beencalled the distinguishing feature of domestic violence. Abusive mentypically control their wives with violence and then silence themwith death threats. Even if the battered wife does find the courageto seek help, she may not always receive it. This is a tendency,even among people who abhor other forms of violence, to trivialize,ignore, or justify violence perpetrated by husbands. Also, outsidehis home the abusive husband may appear to be charming. Oftenfriends cannot believe that he beats his wife. Disbelieved and withnowhere to run, many abused wives feel that they have noalternative but to live in constant fear. Battered women who doleave sometimes becomes victims of stalking. Imagine their fear.Someone who has threatened you continues to turn up where you go.He phones you, follows you, watches you and waits for you. He mayeven kill your pet. It is a campaign of terror. (excerpt from 8/8/05 Awake "Why Do So Many Live in Fear onJehovah's Witnesses official website.)
the feeling of being alone is just psychological, its all in our minds that triggers our emotions to feel of being alone. You have to overcome it in a way of finding a diversi…on of your attention and focus. Usually being alone comes when we are not doing anything, when we are not busy, when we are just staring at the ceiling talking to ourselves. We have to think that we have families or friends or ourself to take care of. We have to talk to our soul and convince him/her that our purpose to live is to live for ourself and for our love ones. In this way you will be motivated and inspired to go on living everyday. :)
The phobia related to the extreme fear of being alone is known as Isolophobia, Autophobia, or Monophobia. The phobia can manifest itself in several different ways. Som…e people experience a constant fear of being alone. These individuals feel that they must consistently be in the company of others. In this form, the phobia can have a huge impact on the individual's quality of life and may require years of therapy. Other people only experience the extreme fear of being alone when triggered by some sort of stimuli. This stimulus may be related to a traumatic event in their past that has been linked in the mind to being alone. In a way it is merely a defense mechanism. The fear is created to avoid ever finding yourself in a similar situation to that which caused so much suffering in the past. See Related Links for a complete list of phobias and their meanings See Related Links for an online assessment to find out if you may be suffering from an extreme fear of being alone
Women fear travling alone with good male friends because they most likely think that going on a trip alone with a male friend will start a diffrent kind of relasinship, …and it will make the friendship kind of weird.
according to surveys and newspapers approximatly an average of 72 women die from abusive relationships and rape.
They Think the first time will be the last or they have low selfesteem. Most abusive relationships are not always abusive they haveperiods where no abuse goes on so they stop …considering it apossibility. Answer2: Why are so many women locked into such dangerousrelationships? Many people wonder: Why don't they seek help? Whydon't they leave? The answer, in most cases, is fear. Fear has beencalled the distinguishing feature of domestic violence. Abusive mentypically control their wives with violence and then silence themwith death threats. Even if the battered wife does find the courageto seek help, she may not always receive it. This is a tendency,even among people who abhor other forms of violence, to trivialize,ignore, or justify violence perpetrated by husbands. Also, outsidehis home the abusive husband may appear to be charming. Oftenfriends cannot believe that he beats his wife. Disbelieved and withnowhere to run, many abused wives feel that they have noalternative but to live in constant fear. Battered women who doleave sometimes becomes victims of stalking. Imagine their fear.Someone who has threatened you continues to turn up where you go.He phones you, follows you, watches you and waits for you. He mayeven kill your pet. It is a campaign of terror. (excerpt from 8/8/05 Awake "Why Do So Many Live in Fear onJehovah's Witnesses official website.)
Answer Stand offish, sticking up for their spouse with everything, bruises or broken bones (with excuses), not able to do anything or go out too long, secluded a…way from friends and family unless accompanied by spouse, sad, tries to let you know in various ways but can't, not able to speak on the phone........ The following link has many signs that you should take a look at: http://www.womanabuseprevention.com/html/abuse_signs.html
many of reasons.... maybe they are pregnant and don't wanna fight for custody of the child; maybe they think he won't do it again; maybe they think they deserved it; or maybe …they have low self-esteem and let him beat up on her
Men also but just it's more acute in women than men. This is totally the opposite of what the world is telling us..... God created woman and the characteristics she's …possesses are many. Women have a need desire which God put in them and one of those things is to be a woman, have a together role in her life. Leaving mom and dad and clinging to her husband. It's that total package. The same reason we all need mothers because father for the most part, ME ABSOLUTELY INCLUDED, can't deal with the screaming and crying of babies.
Well, for one, they shouldn't go back at all, and if they do, they are asking for more abuse. Women go back because they are afraid of what might happen in the longrun.
Why are some women unable to handle a normal relationship after being abused by her parents and husbands?
Answer . Just think ... who in your whole life should you love and trust? Well, of course it's your parents. So, if the parents abuse you then for years you have learned …what is around you in your environment ... no trust, no love and you're all on your own. You have "learned" that this is the normal type of family and so, you choose men who dominate and control you as well. It's really not your fault at all, but now you know, and now it's time to see a good psychiatrist or psychologist to help you filter through the garbage you have picked up through the years. Seeing a psychologist/psychiatrist doesn't make you a weak person or a crazy person. For the past 10 years or more before my mother's death she decided I was the worst person on the face of the earth (of course I wasn't) and she was nasty and cruel. I decided I had to walk away from my own mother and it got so bad she had police coming to my door because she thought I was stalking her, breaking into her car or her townhouse. The police had run a check on my brother and I both and of course we were clean, and they told us when a complaint was filed they had to act on it, but knew we were OK and that they had experienced this type of thing from many of the elderly. It was so bad I had to get a "Cease & Desist" order against my mother and that just about did me in. To make a long story short, we found out my mother had been suffering from Dementia. The poor old girl. I am most thankful to God, that my mother was put on a good medication where we did have a good relationship before she died just short of a year later. During that time when I was having difficulties with my mother (and although I had always been good to her) I went to a psychologist just to be sure I was doing all the right things and that I was handling it in a healthy manner. I call these visits to a psychologist periodically a "tune up."\n. \nThis is considered abuse from parents:\n. \nNot feeding a child properly\n. \nLeaving a child home alone at a very early age\n. \nDumping a child on just ANYONE so they can go out somewhere\n. \nNot keeping children clean or dressing them in old raggy clothing\n. \nNo proper medical attention when the child is sick\n. \nBeatings with straps, or any object; kicking, punching or dragging\n. \nSwearing constantly at the child or calling them names and making sure they know they are useless and will never amount to anything. This is mental abuse.\n. \nPlotting one sibling against another\n. \nSexual abuse (the mother knows about it and does nothing.)\n. \nLocking children in closets, bathrooms, etc.\n. \nPurposely scaring the wits out a child (throwing them down into the basement for long periods of time) or telling them they are going to die or that the parents are going to give them away to a stranger.\n. \nLeasing your child out for sexual purposes\n. \nOnce a person has been abused their "survival instinct" cuts in so they become (for good reason) suspicious of everyone. By doing so, they often make mistakes in choosing a husband/wife because the abused doesn't trust anyone that is too nice to them. You or anyone you know in this situation has done nothing wrong, and the very fact your have acknowledged this means you are starting to heal. Now you just need a little help to grow stronger.\n. \nGod bless\nMarcy