What can you say to your wife if she is leaving and wants a divorce and is there anything you can do to win her back if you have tried everything in the last 8 months?

Answer 1

I love you and I want this marriage to work. You are the most important thing to me. You are my everything. Please help me to make this marriage work. I can't bear to lose you.

Answer

The only thing you can do at this point in time is try to convince her to get a trial separation. This means you are still married, can date other people, but it gives you both time to work out things and perhaps rekindle love again. No promises!

You have to be honest with yourself and face yourself in the mirror as to whether you were 95% of the reason the marriage didn't work and then get tough with yourself and realize what your weak points are in the marriage:

Staying out too late with the guys

Working too late most nights

Forgetting important dates such as anniversaries, birthdays, etc.

If you have kids, not taking quality time with them and giving your wife a break

Seldom taking your wife out for a nice dinner, dancing or socializing with other friends.

Having a "ME" attitude and thinking of only yourself such as what makes you happy and not the magic words "WHAT MAKES BOTH OF YOU HAPPY." Sometimes there are things you will have to do with your wife you may not get all fuzzy and excited over, but hey, that's part of marriage and she has to share the same way.

Drinking or drugs (not accusing you here) but if this is a problem that is a sure way to end a marriage and end your life.

When was the last time you paid her a compliment without being lead into it by her?

Mental abuse such as calling her "fat, lazy, homely, not a good wife or mother, etc."

Physical abuse such as pushing, shoving, controlling where she goes and being sure she doesn't become too successful in her life.

I could go on and on, and I know women are complicated, but then again men are too "simple" and the two usually don't jive on the same thought patterns.

Obviously your wife has had enough and she is looking to fullfill a void in her life. If you can talk her into a trial serparation perhaps the distance between you both will work for both of you.

If she is to blame for most of it then it's time to face up to it and let her go. You can't make someone love you.

Good luck Marcy

AnswerGet the book "Love must be tough" by James Dobson AnswerIf all else fails -- I mean ALL here. If all else fails, all you can do is say, "See ya." AnswerSometimes, you just say no. No, you will not give them a divorce. No, you do not believe in no fault divorce. No, the vows you took are sacred and final. No, I will do whatever it takes, spend every dime I have to save my marriage. (This assumes no adultery and no physical abuse.)