What is an unfit mother in Virginia?

Answer 1

First Answer: "a mother who was never taught how to be a mother in the first place and took on the responsibility a a position she wasn't ready for therefore she treats her children according to how people treat her"

The answer above is truly and horribly inadequate. As a contrast, multiple elements of the law would need to be weighed and those elements can vary from jurisdiction to jurisdiction. Additionally, the definition of unfit is generally consistent however the issue of being unfit can be viewed as permanent (in the case of termination of parental rights and balanced against the best interests of the child) or temporary (as in the case of a child being removed by DSS or CWS and then those organizations working with the family for the return). In between, there is the question of how a parent being more of less 'fit' can be weighed when considering the best interests of the child in standard custody matters.

Still, a fit parent must simply meet or surpass a base line of care. So another party even if wildly wealthy and with an impressive history or training in the care of children would not have any rights to a child (even if they were a grandparent, etc.) as long as the parent met the baseline.

The baseline would essentially include basic needs (shelter, food, hygiene) and proper supervision/care to protect the child from hazards. Thus a parent that goes out and leaves children unsupervised would be considered unfit if those children were of an age or inability to supervise themselves for that period of time. Similarly a parent who might harm a child either physically or sexually would be unfit. Of course, the same would be true if the parent inflicted emotional or mental abuse but this is typically extremely difficult to prove.

So the parent that lives in a horrible neighborhood, is very poor, lacks a car or a driver's license and has a horrible criminal record, is not by definition unfit. This varies (as indicated above) if the crimes were committed with the child present (thus placing the child in the way of harm) or if the parent were to fail in providing a basic need (clean clothes, food, etc.).

The real difficulty in identifying an unfit parent emerges when someone else (often a family member) helps for the sake of the children. Thus the 'unfit' parent is then providing for the children even though it is through someone else, still, it would be difficult for a court to find that the parent is unfit if the children are well provided for even if only due to the resources of this other person. Because, after all, how would that line be drawn? If the mother of the unfit parent cares for the children because she has a nice home, steady income, etc. how is that fundamentally different from the parent being able to provide a nanny and a nice home, etc. because they have a great job? Yes, I do see the difference but from the point of the parent's responsibility to the children the fact that good care is provided is the end result and that is what the court would typically concern itself with.