While it seems to me to be a poor choice to identify someone strictly by the sort of building they inhabit, or by close association with a particular structure, in some cases it is useful, such as Lighthouse-keeper.
When asked if they were housewives, many women would respond "I didn't marry a house". Women today have fully fledged careers that have very little to do with their houses. Being noted as a wife pleases some and irritates others who wish to be judged on a wider basis including accomplishments in business or sports, for example.
Here are some alternatives:
Lady of the House, Domestic Engineer, Mother, Mom, homemaker, family manager, home economist, home engineer, mistress of the house, wife and mother, woman of the house