Good friends are so hard to find. Why do people ruin friendships?

Answer 1

I don't think people ruin good friendships intentionally. I think they do it without realizing it. And if they do ruin them intentionally, I think it's because they're afraid of being close to anybody.

I think that everyone now-a-days puts other people they meet under way too much overwhelming, and constant scrutiny to fit the criteria of "the perfect friend." Today's society expects other people to be absolutely flawless. One flaw could mean the abrupt demise of the friendship.

The criteria of being a "good friend" has been so skewed over time, that no one feels completely comfortable with the idea of becoming a "good friend."

Answer to the answer above:

Gosh that hit me... it's like one single mistake and you're dead! Got this friend who loves to throw every little thing that I've done back to my poor face when all i do is only act natural. Good friends aren't find, just depends on how you treat them!!! Guess just don't expect too much, and if your friend can't comply to most of your request, standard please do understand that they're just humans and have their own limitations and personal issues... give them space, they also break down ya know and sometimes moving away from you is the only way to take a breather might mean temporarily or forever.

(and why most leave...) Friendship is a gave and take thingy, you can't do all the whining and crying as she listen quietly be sensitive sometimes. Have you ever thought that maybe she gets tired of listening to complains and whines sometimes and just wanted a quiet moment. When people get tired of the same thing repeated over and over (like complains of this and that) they tend to let go as it only builds a lot of emotional stress even though they're not the ones who are directly facing the problem, but they do absorb most of the impact....*phew* let's face it this is isn't fairy tale or novel we're talking about having the ideal friend stay by your side no matter what through thick and thin etc we're all human just a mere human people, hello???

Different answerer

As the first answer said - I don't think people ruin them intentionally, and I do think that most people are willing to forgive mistakes. Goodness knows I've been forgiven, and I've forgiven other people.

I think what mostly happens is that people just change. Grow apart, and become different people - and, sadly, the people they become aren't always able to remain friends for any number of reasons. For example, right now I'm having to slowly end a friendship with someone. She's not a bad person, and I don't dislike her...but she and I have very different values on something that is - to me - very important. That added with the fact that she's behaving in a pretty selfish manner nowadays, means that the friendship needs to end.

Thing is - neither one of us had the intent of ruining the friendship, and part of it was simply because we grew apart. So, I don't think most people ruin a friendship on purpose, but sometimes friendships just aren't going to last forever no matter what you do.