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I know it must hurt you a great deal, but the fact is ... he's straight and he's not going to change anytime soon. You can't make someone be what they aren't. Go out and date and just not at gay clubs. Gays know who are gay and you can meet them anywhere. Find someone that is interesting, fun, can be serious and listens to your hopes, dreams and feelings. Sometimes when we get into a group of any kind (women even with men) we fall into patterns and some women will quit dating for a time. It applies to gays as well. People simply get hurt. No doubt you find wonderful qualities in this straight guy (something you haven't found yet out there.) There is someone for you, but it takes time and be patient. You will get over this person in time. Whether we are straight or gay the heart hurts the same. All of us at sometime in our lives has had to go through heartbreak, but we do survive. In time the wounds close and we become open and ready to meet someone that will be important in our lives. Try not to be around this straight person if you can. Don't hang out at the same places he's at and don't try to be friends. Meet other people and get busy in your life once again. I found getting busy out there opens up so many doors and when YOU do, it's amazing who can pop into your life. Good luck Marcy

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14y ago
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11y ago

The most important thing to realise in this scenario is that it was not entirely the man's fault. In society, we are often cruel and inhumane in our treatment of homosexuals. As such, many men deny their sexual orientation and attempt to repress it through marriage and having children. They may later realise the mistake they did in repressing their identity and accept that they were wrong in marrying a person of the opposite sex.

Understanding this will make it easier for you to accept the reasons and for you to move on. Talking to him even after the relationship can make things clearer and easier for you to understand. Do not act angrily or demand answers as this will only make him more reluctant to give you any. Instead, you should adopt a caring, understanding, respectful and honest tone. This will encourage him to be honest with you about his feelings and reasoning.

Consulting a relationship or welfare counsellor can also help you in overcoming this situation. Remember that you are not alone; many women have experienced this event as well. Talking to someone who recently went through the same thing, or someone who has been through the same thing can help you understand the situation more.

It is important to realise that no one is particularly "wrong" in this case. Listen to each other if possible and try to accept the reasoning and move on with life.

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Q: How can you get over a straight guy you've fallen for?
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