How can you trust your girlfriend if she lied to you before about her ex and now she tells you it is over with him but you still see danger in every little thing?

Answer 1

There is absolutely nothing wrong with you and she has some "hot steppin'" to do to gain your trust back. She lied to you before, and therefore, why would you trust her. If she has just split up from her ex then there are sometimes periods of adjustment, but, she should ALWAYS be honest with you and explain her feelings. There is no respect here! The only solution to this problem is to sit down and discuss this whole mess with her and you judge from there. Watch her eyes and if she can't look you in the eyes then she's not telling you the truth. Body language is another dead give away ... squirming, shifting from foot to foot; rocking from foot to foot; moving around the room or going into another room when answering your question; fidgeting with her hands. If someone is telling the truth when asked a question they should be able to stand solid and look that person in the eye. Although this method isn't always fool-proof it's 98% for sure. Then you will have to realize that everyone of us makes mistakes and hopefully most of us learn from those mistakes. You have to ask yourself how much you love her and is she worth all your worry and concern. List the good things about her, and then things that make you feel like she could be cheating on you. If your girl is: Wandering like a gypsy and can't sit still, and never let's you know where she is from time-to-time, then you have reason to worry. If she can't just stay with you for an evening or go out with you on the weekend then you two aren't dating on a steady basis. If you are getting strange phone calls such as someone phoning and she goes into another room or looks sneaky and tells the person at the other end she'll get back to them, then be suspicious. If she shares nothing with you such as your hopes and dreams then this isn't a relationship either. Loyalty, honesty and respect for one another is what a good relationship is made out of. When I went with my husband we couldn't wait to see each other on the weekend and I was separated from my ex husband at the time. We went out with friends or there was just the two of us and had fun! We laughed, we got serious and talked about serious things, but we did enjoy life and loyalty and honesty were never a question between us. We respected each other and had high morals. NEVER let anyone control you! You are in control of your own destiny! You take control of this situation and when you sit down and have that talk with her you let 'er rip and tell her that if she's not telling the truth and she sees her ex again you are out the door (or, if it's your place, kick her butt out the door.) Good luck Marcy