How do you deal with a coworker who will not change the toilet paper or paper towel roll?

Answer 1

Thanks for asking. Luckily, I am an expert on matters such as these, having been subjected to the harrowing task of finding spare paper in the work bathroom with poo all over my bum. I can sympathize with you as I consider these disgusting excuses for human beings the worst kind of scum.

Firstly, what you need to do is realize that continuing to ask these people to change the toilet paper to no avail will be a waste of valuable working time - I'm confident you have none to waste on frivolous matters such as these. If others can't change their ways, then perhaps you can. When wiping your pooey bum, rather than removing a section of paper from the roll, try unrolling a section, wiping your bum with it still attached, and rolling it back up. This way when your coworker goes to wipe their own pooey bum later, they will see that this section of paper has already been used to wipe poo. If they don't want to go around the office with an itchy backside and smelly trousers, they will have to replace the paper - all at no extra effort to you, and no awkward confrontations having arisen.

An alternative solution is to find a way not to have to use the office toilet. Try a low fiber diet, pooing outside in a public toilet, defecating discreetly into a plastic bag etc.

Good luck!