Abusive Relationships and Domestic Violence

How do you get over being afraid to leave your abusive relationship because you know he will cheat?


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2006-04-25 04:38:38
2006-04-25 04:38:38

Hon, I can bet my bottom dollar this guy is already cheating on you, so the only fear you should have at this point is getting away from him and becoming an independent young woman. You don't need him! There are Abused Women's Centers around, or, if he's not violent, just pack your bags when he's not around and move in with a relative or friend. This guy is a loser and the sooner you get rid of him the better. Abusive people are about control and they seldom change and 99% of them never seek professional help for their abusive behavior. Good luck Marcy


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You should definitely go. An abusive relationship is unhealthy for you both physically and emotionally. If you continue to stay with that abusive person, you will more than likely end up being attracted to more abusive people in the future. In fact some abusive relationships can lead to suicide and/or being murdered.

Usually women do this because it is all they know. Many women will pick partners that are abusive because they've had abusive fathers, etc.

if your girlfriend is getting abusive. then just end the relationship; because once a person starts to be abusive towards their significant other than they are not going to stop. It may be because she likes the feeling of power that she gets from hitting you or that she comes from an angry backround. Either way it is best to just stay away from her until she stops being abusive.

No, because if they are still being abusive, they see the world from another perspective. If you are expecting that this will happen or that you can convince someone that they are abusive, chances are that you won't see it happen. About all you can do is to call them on their behavior, saying how it makes you feel. A good book is Patricia Evan's The Abusive Relationship.

Women should get out of an abusive relationship because it may escalate from emotional abuse to physical or sexual abuse, sometimes even murder. No one deserves to be abused and to stay in an abusive relationship is not worth it. If you are being abused, please leave and find help, especially if you have children, you need to protect them too.

the way to tell if you are in an abusive relationship is if your partner is forcing you to do things that are harmful to your saftey, or dangerous. like things you dont want to do. so remember, being forceful, or hurting one another in a relationship is abusive. even if it is the smallest thing like a hit on the head becasue you said no, its still abusive..hope this helped

The person being abused and any children who are there to witness it are victims.

It exist because the person being hurt stays in the relationship thinking the abuser will stop. Face reality this person has issues and they will not just up and change. I would advise anyone who is in an abusive relationship whether physical,emotional or verbal get out while you still can, because the abuser is not going to change magically.

Getting out of an abusive relationship is the same, whether you've been together 30 days or 30 years. Please read the info in the link I provided below.

according to surveys and newspapers approximatly an average of 72 women die from abusive relationships and rape.

No the abuser does not love that person they love controlling and abusing that person and that's it. It is difficult for there to be love in an abusive relationship. The abuser can not truly give love or receive it because he or she is mentally disabled. The abusive personality is a mental disorder and the abuser needs to seek psychiatric help. An abusive relationship is not a healthy one and no matter what the abuser says, he or she can not love you, it is obsession and control that drives an abusive partner.

Sometimes it may be hard to get out of an abusive relationship. This is because violent relationships often go in cycles. After a person is violent, he or she may apologize and promise never to hurt you again, and even say that they will work on the relationship. It may be a while before that person acts violently again. These ups and downs can make it hard to leave a relationship.It's hard to leave someone you care about. You may be scared or ashamed to admit that you are in an abusive relationship, or you may be simply scared to be alone. You may be afraid that no one will believe you, or that your friend or partner will hurt you more if you tell someone. Whatever the reasons, leaving an unhealthy relationship is hard but something you must do, and you'll need help to do it.Abusive relationships are very unhealthy for you. You might have trouble sleeping, or have headaches or stomach aches. You might feel depressed, sad, anxious, or nervous. You may also blame yourself, feel guilty, and have trouble trusting other people in your life. Staying in an abusive relationship can hurt your self-confidence and make it hard for you to believe in yourself. If you are being physically abused, you can be the victim of injuries that could cause permanent damage. You should definitely leave the relationship if you are getting hurt, if you have bruises or pain, or if you are being threatened with physical harm in any way.Remember that the most important reason to leave an unhealthy relationship is because you deserve to be in a relationship that is healthy and fun.

People tend to say things in anger. Since your husband is abusive you should consider going to a Woman's Abuse House to find help and learn tools to cope. No one has the right to abuse the other. Your relationship is toxic and you are in control of your life and not your husband. To tell him you are going to kill him is a serious accusation and when you get to this point it's time for you to leave this abusive relationship.

Well easy, are you being called names (not jokingly) or hit, punched ect? OR being told you have to prove your love by... or you might be consistantly being yelled at...

You should really take time for yourself and sort these feelings out before you consider being in a relationship. Counselling helps.

No! Just because your relationship is not a good one does not make it "abusive" it just means it is not working. It seems that the rules are being made by only one person in the relationship and if you don't like that then either claim your right to equality or change the relationship. Don't be a victim or fall on the crutch of being abused.

if they had low self asteem, and their partner abused them, they think that they will never find love again, so they stay in the loveless relationship because they are afraid of being alone.

The first time, should be the last time.Kids should really be put first in this situation because the trauma of an abusive environment can affect them as they grow older in so many ways.Also if this question is being asked on behalf of yourself, you deserve better, I'm sure because nobody deserves to be abused, especially in a relationship, it should be about love, happyness, trust etc and I know that in an abusive relationship there is more sadness than there is happiness. I'm sure you will have the love and support of your children if you were to leave and they will be the ones who bring you true happiness as they flourish in life.

Sometimes being nice can hurt someone. If someone is in an abusive relationship, for example, it may not be the right thing to be soft on them by sympathizing. Sometimes as a real friend you have to be tough on them until they get out of the relationship, because you know it's best for them.

Some one who does not understand BDSM posted "being into bdsm is an unhealthy sign" this is a lie. All studies of people into BDSM have shown that most people into BDSM are happy normal people who just have kinks to there life. Most people who are into abusive relationships never get into BDSM relationships. If someone is into BDSM and there is also a abusive relationship going on all you need to do is look for the normal signs of a abusive relationship. Most BDSM couples for the most part have happy and healthy relationships but have a relationship that looks more like the idealized ones from the 1950's and may add play that would look abusive from the outside but is truly not. What I would tell people is take time to talk to both parties and look for the signs of an abusive relationship.

they will cringe, sort of, when around their spouse and be very timid when doing something so as not to anger him/her.

I'm not sure if it's a full-blown emotional abusive relationship, or even on the road to becoming that way, but I do feel taken advantage of him at times.

Blaming the victim, or partner is one of the many ways the abusive person uses to confuse the victim and/or to make it "seem" acceptable. Please read The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans and visit for more information.

Because they are not being fulfilled in the relationship.

There is no answer to your question, at least not one that you can be sure is right. What you need to consider is how strong the person is, how good a support system other family and friends are providing... and Does this person truly want out? Trying to change someone, staying because you love the person or being afraid to leave all are major factors in how long it takes.

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