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How do you get your husband to actively listen to your emotions not just listen but understand.He is my best friend. but his personality type is emotionally unavailable when it comes to my issues.?
Seekergirl
I assume he expects you to listen to, and understand him. Why is reciprocating so hard for so many men? Call me cynical but I believe that many men secretly find their female partner's emotions boring and a little beneath them. Thirty odd years of feminism hasn't really done much. If he is loving and caring in other ways then count yourself lucky and find emotional release with female friends. If he is emotionally withholding most of the time then that is a power play designed to keep you off balance and in your place - beneath him. Emotionally Unavailable! Yes, we are not all the same. Italians are more emotional than Finns. Women are more emotional than men. In today's society we express more emotions than in past societies. So you must realize that lack of emotional expression can have many causes. Parents, culture, sex! But expression ones emotions is a two-edged sword.There are certain benefits but also possible disadvantages to expressing emotions. The advantage lies in the fact that to experience another person's emotiions allows a more open relationship. But, on the other hand, the expression of anger ( also an emotion ) carries with it certain dangers that can only be eliminated by a prior agreement to accept its expression. (The Tit for Tat solution described in the book recommendation # 2 on my Bio Page).
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∙ 15y ago
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