How do you give yourself a hanging wedgie without your underware ripping?

This is impossible. But if you would like to know how to be in a hanging wedgie for a long period of time before it breaks, here's how: Make sure you have an elliptical machine or something tall with a round soft point. Before you hook your underwear over the top of the object that will hold you up, make sure you are wear BRIEFS. (This technique doesn't work with boxers/boxer briefs). Wear you briefs backwards. The reason why is because there is more fabric there which makes much more durable. Then hook the front (as it is on backwards) to the soft pointed object. Take your feet off and your suspended for a good while. P.S. if you want to get down before it breaks, leave the chair there until needed. That way you just have to throw the pair of underwear in the washer and they're ready for another wedgie.