How do you handle the pressures of being gay and coming out of a straight relationship with kids?
If you haven't already done so, get in touch with PFLAG -- Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays. They're a great group of people (chapters all over the country) and they understand your situation. You don't have to deal with this alone. You didn't say how old your kids were. If they are very young then you should have visitation rights and keep your private life to yourself and away from the children. If they are in their teens then you and your mate should sit down and explain the circumstances. Most kids in their teens know about gays and although it may be a bit of a shock to them at first, they will eventually come to realize that you are not any different than you were before with the exception you prefer the same sex. There is absolutely no scientific study that can prove that a gay father/mother can't have a good relationship with their child and, in fact, many gay monogamous couples are adopting and the child is healthy mentally and lead a straight life. It's very important that you remain true to yourself and that you communicate well with your kids if they are of age to discuss you being gay. Kids know more than most adults give them credit for. You know that you are going to come across some complications with perhaps family and friends, but, know yourself, be true to yourself and simply keep your personal gay life where it belongs ... personal and spend quality time with your kids. I would like to add that many gay people come from all walks of life and that just by looking at a person in many cases you would never guess they were gay. Sports orientated people are gay, longshoremen can be gay, executives can be gay, etc. Good luck Happy New Year