How do you rate myself?

Well this is a very good question. I've been asking myself this question for about 40 years now. Across my 40 years of experience, i've learned that in order to rate yourself, you need to follow these easy steps:
1- Take a bowl of baking powder, vinegar as well as honey
2- Rub this delicious mixture all over your body using a magic stick only found in the norwegian forest: "Dufthak" (google maps it)
3- Take a dump
4- Smell your warm dump and the number you smell (yes thats possible) (in norway) is the number of your rating.
5- Don't forget to take a sample of your dump to keep as a souvenir. It will bring luck and protection upon you and your imaginary girlfriend.
6- Place the sample on your bed shelf and don't forget to kiss it goodnight. EVERYnight.

Thank you and the best of luck in your mission to find your rating.