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The proper etiquette of course varies by language and country, but the following approach ought to work well with English-speaking Americans.

In any case, you want to express your heartfelt appreciation, which cannot be in anyone else's words but your own. This is a guideline: start off with something like "Thank you. This money is very much appreciated, and comes at a time when I really need it." This lets your beneficiary know that he or she was successful in helping, which is after all what they wanted if their motivation was pure.

If the money was intended as a loan and not an outright gift, you should probably, in addition, specify when and how you intend to pay it back. Perhaps "I should be back on my feet, financially, in another month or two, and can hopefully start paying $100 per month until it's paid off. Will that work for you?" Note the "should be" and "hopefully"; nobody knows what the future holds. This is your intent, not a promise. Asking their opinion lets them know you are sincere and recognizing their needs as they recognized yours.

If, however, you know it was intended as a gift, you might still want to offer "When I finally get back on my feet financially, would you rather I paid the money back, or should I 'pay it forward' to someone else in need?" Maybe they are making a financial sacrifice for you, and could really use the money themselves, and this gives them a face-saving chance to let you know.

If it's not clear what the intent was, ask! "I obviously cannot pay it back at this time, and probably not for another month or two at least. Once I'm making money again, what would be a workable repayment plan for you"? If the answer comes back with something you don't feel comfortable with, you have the option of returning as much of the money as you can at this point, and can seek assistance elsewhere. It's probably better not to accept money from someone who can't really afford to give it.

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16y ago
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13y ago

A handwritten thank you note is always appropriate.

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