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How should a girl deal with her possessive parents after her marriage?
Dgod
- It depends on what you call possessive. If your parents are constantly interfering in your lives then that is possessive. If they just want to see you a couple of times a month this is not possessive. When parents let their children go the mother especially can experience 'empty nest syndrome' which means she has always loved and cared for her child or children and suddenly they are grown up and do not need her any longer. The fathers are generally quieter about missing their children, but some fathers can resent or dislike the husband of his daughter because the husband has taken his little girl away and he fears she will not be treated the way she should be. With parents it is all about losing control of their children when they become adults. Think about your childhood and the quality of life you had with your parents and realize they did all of that because they loved you and now you are an adult; married and they feel a loss (almost like grieving for a loved one that has passed away.) This will eventually end. Go and see your parents and tell them you love them and understand it is hard for them to adjust, but you too are adjusting to marriage and then set some rules down for them. You are now an adult and in control of your own life. Plan to go shopping with your mother every so often or take her for lunch. It wouldn't hurt to invite dear old dad for lunch either. Have them over for dinner or take them out for dinner once a month and bring your husband along so your parents can really get to know him. Remind your parents that one day they will have grandchildren and you will be sure to keep them part of your children's lives. It is up to you to convince your parents you love them and will always keep them in your life, but they have to respect your needs as well.
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