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If you are scared to tell your parents, then talk to another responsible adult - one that will tell you WHY YOU ARE VERY WRONG TO EVEN CONSIDER IT. This is not trying to preach to you or judge you - it's just looking at the cold, hard facts. Having a baby at 14 is an extreme risk to your health - it can literally kill you. According to UNFPA and the World Health Organization, girls age 15 through 19 are twice as likely to die during pregnancy or child birth as those over age 20; girls under age 15 are five times more likely to die. Even if it doesn't kill you it can cause permanent health problems. That doesn't even begin to cover all the economic and social problems that will result.

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Wouldn't you want to wait until you're older? I'm your age, and there is no way I could raise a child. By having a child, you are giving up your teenage social life because you won't have time. You will not get as much sleep. Your grades will suffer. Also, remember that while babies are cute, they also grow up to be moody and act up. Do you want to be responsible for the growth of someone else while you are still growing?

If you are 'thinking' about having a baby at 14, you are not thinking! How are you going to pay for a baby? Not to mention how are you going to pay for your support for the rest of your life? Going to find free child care so you can finish middle school and then go to high school so you can hope to have something better than a minimum wage job?

Not to mention sexual intercourse at such a young age is illegal. In most States it is statutory rape and in others it is illegal sexual contact.

ANSWERWhy do you want to have a baby now your only 14 you have the rest of your life for that. Having a baby is a huge commitment that should not be taken lightly. A baby will look to you for everything--and babies need constant love and nurturing for their brain to grow properly. How are you going to support it as your not even entitled to state benefits at your age? You should definitely wait until you have finished school settled down with the right person and have accommodation and a regular income of your own. In the meantime I suggest you visit your doctor for the contraceptive pill.

Reasons not to have a baby at 14:

  • Babies need constant attention and loving care - which you are NOT mature enough to provide
  • They need it from YOU, and they need a full-time father, too. Your parents ARE NOT your baby-sitting service!
  • If you have a baby your education will suffer. You may still go to school, but once it is at home that baby is your responsibility and then you will have to fit time into your heavy schedule to study for tests at school.
  • You will no longer be free to hang out with your girlfriends; go to movies whenever you want or parties. You're face will be pressed up against that window of your parent's home watching all the other kids you know have a fun time, while you are at home looking after your baby as well as keeping your studies up. Without an education you can't get a good enough job to bring up your baby.
  • Babies are not dolls! You don't just take them off the shelf, dust them off and play with them. Babies need 24/7 care and you are selfish to think that your parents should pick up the slack while you are at school (the responsibility will probably lay 100% on your mother.)
  • Babies get colic; fevers, diarrhea, go off their food, can cry through the night, vomit (you'll be changing a lot of diapers and changing the baby's clothing more than you will ever know.) You just can't let the baby cry. They need you to respond to their needs, this is an important developmental period for their brain. Sometimes you will need to watch them all night long when they are sick. What are you going to do if your baby is ill? Expect your parents to pay for the medical bills? Your boyfriend is either your age or perhaps a year or two older so he won't be financially sound enough to provide medical help for the baby which is very expensive.
  • It is not right to knowingly get pregnant at your age (mistakes do happen) and expect tax payers to pick up the tab should your parents not want to look after a baby ... did you ever think of that!
  • If your boyfriend doesn't know you want a baby then it's wrong to get pregnant on purpose without discussing it with him. He may think it's a great idea, but you'll soon find out that once that baby is born and you both realize what a tough road is ahead of you he may well leave the situation and being so young he won't be able to support you or the baby and the stress and added expense will land on your parent's shoulders. As for any dreams you have had for your life? Forget them. You won't have time to work toward them until your child has grown.

Generally when a young person wants to have a baby they feel they are not loved as much as they should be ... something is missing and so they feel they can transfer their love onto a baby that will love them back. Having children is a wonderful thing and child birth a miracle in itself, but not when you are a child yourself. You are not mentally or physically prepared to give birth and raise a child.

Please go onto the internet and learn more about parenthood and what all the responsibilities are that go with it. Learn from chats (such as Wiki s here under teen pregnancies) what other young teens say about having a baby too soon. Most wish they'd never gotten pregnant.

You are a fine young person and I'm betting you are smarter than this. Now that some of us have given our views on this subject and you read the experiences of others under 'teen pregnancy' on Wiki s that you'll be smart enough to wait until you are older. Don't waste your young life and enjoy your teen years because they go by so quickly. Once your teen years are over reality sets in and statistically speaking about 50 - 60 years of reality shoved up your nose. Don't blow it by getting pregnant!

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Q: If you are 14 and thinking about having a baby but are scared about telling your parents what should you do?
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