If you really love someone you've been married to for 36 years would you continue to cheat on and lie to them?

No, you would not cheat and lye to them. There obvioiusly is no LOVE if your spouse is continually doing this. Why would you put up with this kind of behavior? What are you waiting for. If it is the number 36 that keeps holding you back, it's only a number. There is a whole wonderful life out there, and no one needs this kind of grief in their lives. The love and respect for you is gone. It sounds like this is a marriage of convenience only ie, for finacial, security and or dependant reasons. Why you would still be holding on, is the big question? You know, it is as much your fault as your spouses, to even allow this kind of infidality to continue. Make a plan, and follow through, change your life. You deserve to be happy too!