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YOU must realize you are always in control of yourself and not anyone else. He may well not know what he wants or he could be using you. Instead of letting him come and go out of your life tell him off and tell him you're not there when things get tough and he feels like a relationship with you. He hasn't given your feelings or any thought and he isn't treating you well at all. Perhaps you should take this as a sign of someone that is self centered and self absorbed in themselves and YOU should always expect someone that loves you to put you first. This guy doesn't! Tell him when he grows up to look you up and meanwhile start dating other guys. NEVER let a guy come between you and what you want and learn to be more independent. One thing many guys like is a woman that is independent, not clingy or needy and if you show him you simply don't care and move on he's going to have to either make up his mind about you and treat you with the respect you deserve or he needs to move on.

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Q: Is a guy using you if he said he didn't want to be you with you anymore but yet he has said that before and still wanted to pursue a relationship or does he actually love you?
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