Perfectly normal. He cheated on her, how can she trust him now and be intimate? It is possible after a lot of work, but the doubt will always be there no matter how long they stay together. Trust is earned, he lost all that he had and will never reach the same level again.
An affair is a betrayal of trust, and it is very hard to be comfortable and intimate with someone (your husband or anyone else) when your trust has been betrayed.
There ca an intimacy after an affair if they still have feelings for each other.
Yes. All the time. I can't think of the last time we have had sex where I wasn't thinking about if he was thinking about her. I just don't want to do it anymore to be honest.
Your husband had a tongue in his head and he could have said 'no' to having an affair with the other woman or, he started the affair so it is up to the husband to resolve the problem with the mistress contacting the wife and himself. If the husband does not stop the ex mistress from phoning his wife and himself then the wife should at least apply for a separation because he may still be seeing the mistress.
because she wanted to protect him
yes.two wrongs do not make a right. Thou shalt not covert thou neighbors wife /husband. I would say that the marriage is clearly over is its clear the wife is only home to save money and is leaving. Discuss it and end it. If you like another person, be honest and let them know what is going on. If they want to continue seeing you then I dont see it as a problem unless the affair is going to complicate the divorce.
an american affair
An "emotional affair" is an affair, which excludes physical intimacy but includes emotional intimacy. It may also be called an affair of the heart. Where one partner is in a committed monogamous relationship, an emotional affair is a type of chaste nonmonogamy without consummation. When the affair breaches an agreement in the monogamous relationship of one of the partners to the affair, the term infidelity may be more apt source: wikipedia
You do not tell your husband's girlfriend's employer anything. The employer is a businessman and is not interested in the private affairs of his employees unless it interferes with their work performance. It should be your husband you are going after and if you feel the relationship is over then file for divorce. Your husband is the one that started this affair because he either provoked the affair or he could have said 'no' if she suggested having an affair with him. Put the blame where it belongs ... your husband!
Most definitely - sounds like the start of an affair or they are already having an affair, confront your husband or her face to face.
because she was having an affair with her husband
She doesn't want to be with her husband. If you're the husband, communicate with her about the problem and address the issues. Otherwise it will be too late.