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Yes. After 3 years, if he wants you to understand his not being ready for marriage, he needs to discuss the reasons he feels this way. Chances are that he doesn't want to discuss marriage, because he isn't ready for it and he isn't sure that you are the person he wants to spend the rest of his life committed or married to. (I would understand his feelings more if you are both younger--early to mid twenties, or are still working on your education or careers and haven't had time to live your own life.) If you are disastisfied with your relationship, you can initiate the next step: put up or shut up. Tell your boyfriend that you are looking for a committed relationship that will result in marriage. If he can't provide that, then it's best for both of you to break up. You need to prepare for a break up. You still care about your boyfriend, but some relationships just reach the highest point that they ever will and then settle into an inertia before they end. They coast on and on, exactly like they are with no progress forward or backward. Unfortunately this one hit that point before marriage and commitment came into the picture. If you want marriage, it's best to date around and look for a guy who will desire that type of relationship with you. Wouldn't you rather be with a guy who wants to be married to you and talks about the future instead of one that says no to you?

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Q: Should you just move on if after being in a relationship with a man for 3.5 years he still is not ready for marriage and it's the 3rd time after you've mentioned the subject that he has said NO?
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