What are some sarcastic things to say if someone insults you?

Answer 1

You could say "that's nice" or if someone calls you a horrible, pathetic jerk you could say "You're the horrible pathetic jerk, not me". You could tell them that unless they stop insulting you, you're going to write about their insults on facebook and share it with all your friends. You could say that they wouldn't like it someone called them that. If it gets too bad tell someone you know and trust. It isn't wimpish to tell, it is actually very brave. If it gets even worse, tell that person that they are not your friend anymore and unfriend and block them on facebook. It is better not to be friends with mean people who insult you. Another sarcastic thing to say would be to tell them to tell them is that they are a very, very lovely kind person who is your best friend in a ridiculously romantic, smoochy voice. If they are continuously racist or sexist to you, you may want to call the police on them.

Answer 2

One of my all-time favorites:

If someone calls you a name, respond with: "...I've been called worse by better people than you..." Better to say it with a smile, and no drama. Just keep on doing or saying what you were doing before. Most of the time, people just don't know what to say to that.