What are some tips on how to deal with indirect bullying?

Answer 1

Bullying is the dynamic of trying to take away as much power and control from another person, trying to "take over" the essence of who that person is - repeatedly.

Girls tend more toward relational bullying (verbal, emotional, social), boys tend more towards physical.

Indirect bullying: ostracizing, exclusion, rejection, name calling, spread rumors, lies behind victim's back, nitpicking. Abusing the need to feel acceptance and validation.

Telling a grown up that you trust entirely, but only for advice, as it is common knowledge that external involvement is seen as further weakness, and can lead to further, more potent bullying.

How to deal with it. Call them on it, turn the tables on the bully. NEVER show you are mad, that just what they want. "Fake it till you make it" - Stay cool and calm, be confident, use humor, stand up straight, look the bully in the eye, say what you have to say and then, walk away.

Direct bullying is physical, emotional, mental, and/or sexual assault and is illegal. Save evidence whenever you can and report it. Domestic violence, rape, and mugging victims do this - you have that right too.

NO ONE has the right to take your power away from you, and they cannot do it unless you ALLOW them to.

For onlookers: imagine that was your younger sibling, how do you feel watching this go down? Step-in, stop it... “Every time we witness an injustice and do not act, we train our character to be passive in its presence and thereby eventually lose all ability to defend ourselves and those we love. In a modern economy it is impossible to seal oneself off from injustice." ~ Julian Assange

For the bully: I'm sorry your life is that miserable. Someone stole your power and you're trying to get it back by taking someone else's... This is all you know. But it doesn't work that way, you lose more power by trying to take it from another. Reclaim your own power and dignity, because you never really lost it in the first place.

Hope this helps ^<))

Answer 2

Although the bully is probably doing this on purpose, they might actually not realise they are doing it. If you feel conscious that they might be aggressive towards you, get one of your 'tougher' mates to go up to the bully with you as defence, in case something happens, and you should tell them that what they are doing isn't nice. They may ask 'What have I done?' as nobody likes to hear what they have done wrong and the natural human reaction is to put up defence barriers. So tell them how they have made you feel, and what they have done to make you feel this way. They may not be aware of what they are doing, so do not be aggressive as it may in fact make YOU seem like a bully. If this does not work, speak to a trusted adult and maybe the bullying will stop.