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Answered 2005-09-21 14:00:55

You haven't said if you are a man, woman or teenager. So, I'll have to divide it up here. Women who are abused are in a lesser position. They usually have children to raise and because the abusive spouse likes total control they seldom allow their victim to work, so it's tough for her to leave and make a living to raise her kids or even for herself. Believe it or not there are many men out there that are abused by their spouses and these is a very difficult situation for them because men are suppose to be strong, in control and not take "crap" from anyone. However, good men are taught by their mothers that they should never hit a woman. I've seen women hit, slap, throw things, kick and bite their partner and the look of confusion and astonishment on the male's face is sad. How do you control a woman that is doing this? The best thing to do is to just leave this woman and don't look back. Get a divorce. Children who are in abusive relationships with a partent(s) can actually go to Child Welfare for help and they will come and look over the situation and in most cases will remove that child from the home and place them either with grandparents or other relatives and sometimes foster care. The bottom line is, adult male, female or kids should never have to tolerate abusive behavior. There is "Abused Women's Centers" in your area or phone your "Mental Health" and they will lead you in the right direction. There is also help for men that are abused and it's best for men to go to Mental Health to find the right groups to join. All get good counseling and protection with legal counsel and also for the women help in placing them in jobs so they can live on their own or with their children. Women must realize once you leave you can't ever go back. If you do, things will become much worse and the noose around your life will become much tighter and life will be unbearable. So, pack what you can, hide it, find a trusted friend (or do it on your own) and get to that Women's Abuse Center. They will put you up in a "Safe House" and not even staff knows where you will be. Good luck God Bless Marcy Contact any of the following organizations pertaining to your personal situation for guidance and assistance. National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233; National Child Abuse Hotline 1-800-392-3738; National Youth Crisis Hotline 1-800-448-4663; Certified Crisis Center 1-800-784-2433; National Elderly Abuse Hotline 1-800-392-0210. At one stage you have to make up your mind. Will you stay and put up with it or will you organize carefully a way to get out there. It is up to you you make the decision when you feel you can do it. I have been there, it is such a relief when you made the decision and run away. Make sure you go to a safe place. Contact womenshelter in your area or phone befriending service who can give you lots of good and useful information. God bless you.

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