I have an 8-year old step child and maybe this will help. I would imagine, from what you have described of the situation, that the child has some strong anxiety and concern with having the people she loves be there. Your child is old enough to talk about this, ask the hard questions in a way that allows her to speak freely, find the source. Ask the child what would help them feel better. Maybe a special blanket or animal to sleep with from the missing mom would provide comfort, possibly a song to play or a picture by the bed, a nightlight. Also, reinforce all day every day the love you have for the child so she can feel comfort and safety in your home. Try getting a little farther through the night, each night, go by the 1/2 hour, and provide a reward that the child learns to sleep in her bed on her own. I do not believe that having the child sleep with you or sleeping with the child will help, but will hinder. Yes, there are exceptions: illness, thunderstorm, etc., but, not nightly. Best of luck.
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