I realize you are not only hurting, but truly puzzled over this so could you please give us a little more detail into your relationship and post below so we can give you the best advice we can give? Thanks For now I'll give my opinion just based on your question. This could mean a lot of things. It's apparant there is absolutely no communication between the two of you or you'd have talked about your problems. People just don't up and walk out of a relationship. There are signs when a person is unhappy and often there IS a reason although it may have nothing to do with you. Some men can't stand being on a one-to-one with a partner and grow weary. Men can feel hemmed in or, they simply aren't mature enough. Age 40 plus a man can go through "Andropause" which use to be called "mid-life crisis" and feel that he is getting old fast and wants to "sew his oats" meaning to do as he pleases. He could feel that he hasn't accomplished much in his life and wants to do other things and can't because he's with a partner. He could have met another woman. On and on the list goes. After 9 years with him you have a right to know!