What is wrong with you if your boyfriend beats you up?

Answer 1

Absolutely nothing is wrong with you at all.

However, there is something wrong with your boyfriend.

Abusive spouses will often blame the reasons for their abuse on their partners. This is because they lack the ability to see the problem is actually themselves.

There is nothing wrong with you whatsoever.

Your boyfriend on the other hand needs counselling. He needs anger management. He needs a psychologist. It is not normal to abuse your spouse for any reason.

You are strongly advised to report the abuse to the authorities.

I know, you don't want to because you love him and he promises he'll change. But the love doesn't actually exist, it's a psychological effect similar to Stockholm Syndrome where you feel a connection to the abusive person for your own survival - it is not love, but it is often mistaken for love. The promises to change are empty. He cannot change himself, he needs professional help, possibly medication.

I strongly advise you to report the abuse to the authorities. They will protect you. The law is on your side. They will get professional help for this man, but in order to get him that help, they will have to place him under arrest, because he is very unlikely to go willingly.

Abuse of partners in relationships causes thousands of deaths a year. Don't become a domestic abuse death statistic. Get out, get help.