What to do about a recruiter who told son to lie about having ADD?

Answer 1

The military's legal term for this is "Fraudulent Enlistment", though it depends on whether he was asked to lie before or after enlisting. - I myself went through it when I joined in '79, though in my case it was different. I didn't report previous drug experimentation, and decided to come clean in boot camp. It was both a good and bad decision.

It's important to understand the Military Recruiting system in time of war. Things are different, as they don't look as hard for disqualifiers. The disqualification system is based primarily on whether it's been reliably diagnosed by a qualified MD, and is bad enough that the recruit is either still receiving treatment (e.g., Ritalin), or has within the past year. If not, it's not a problem, and bringing up "what about this?" situations is pointless if it's not necessary. Essentially, it's a don't ask, don't tell scenario; if you don't tell them, they won't investigate. Recruiters know this, and though it isn't official policy, the Naval Recruiting Command has an unofficial policy that if a person's background is okay (meaning they're not a psycho, criminal, or the person has a clear medical problem) then do what's necessary to process the recruit for enlistment.

Keep in mind also that it makes no bit of difference if a Recruiter told your son to lie or not. In the end, if he did, it was HIS DECISION to do so, as it was mine 30 years ago. That makes it his responsibility, and not the Recruiter. The Navy will not take the word of a recruit over a decorated Veteran with years of service unless you have absolute proof that he/she told your son to lie, and Recruiters aren't that stupid. If there's no proof, then it's a his/her word against your son's, and your son has admitted to Fraudulent Enlistment, where the Recruiter is a Veteran with distinctive service. That's no contest in a military court - remember if your son is in the Navy, civilian legal rules do not apply. Everything is governed by the UCMJ, and you have no legal guardianship over him after he signs the enlistment contract. If he was under 18, you had to sign a waiver, which gave up your rights. If he's 18 or older, he's an adult and responsible for his own actions - period. Many people don't like to hear that or face it, but in the end, responsibility is a big deal in the military. In my case I realized and knew it was my responsibility for not disclosing certain facts, not my recruiter's, so I didn't implicate him. I have never regretted that decision - he did what was in my best interest, and though I felt morally obligated to tell the truth, which got me in trouble, in the end it worked out. The only thing I lost was my original career path, which was Nuclear Engineering, something I was talked into anyway that I really didn't want to do. I was allowed to choose my original career choice, which was as a Submarine Sonar Technician. Knowing what Nuke's go through on board ship, I look back and I'm glad it happened. But I also know it wouldn't have made any difference if I had said nothing either.

Now, having said that, what it comes down to is whether or not your son wants to stay in the Navy or not, and whether or not the problem is a medical disqualifier or not. If it is, case closed and they process him out on an Admin/General discharge, which will be changed to an honorable down the road. Remember that boot camp is a weeding out process - the military doesn't want to ruin the lives of people who just couldn't make it in the military. If he can stay, I'd say it would probably be the best thing for him, as the military can give a person the confidence and focus that is often harder to obtain at home, especially if some idiot doctor tells you your kid has a problem. ADD isn't a medical problem - is a sociological one. Years ago when we were kids, when we got home from school the first thing we did was go out and play with other kids. Today, kids get home and turn on their computers or video game consoles.

A fraud enlist goes one of 2 ways, and it depends on the recruit - if the problem is an automatic disqualifier, then it's a done deal and the person is processed out. But if they didn't find it during processing, it means that whatever problem he may have wasn't bad enough to DQ him from the process - meaning they don't want to get rid of him. In my case, I told them I wanted to stay in. It's still in my record of course, but it ended up as a no further action required. I did 2 active duty tours totaling 8 years, and 3 more in the Reserves at the Chief of Naval Operations at the Pentagon. Trust me when I tell you that trying to make a big deal out of this will only hurt your son more than it will his Recruiter, and that the Navy is probably the best thing for him to give him what he really needs. I remember that I flunked Geometry in high school - I wasn't a very good student, and had Guidance Counselors telling me how stupid I was all the time. As it turned out, I was bored and unchallenged - the Navy taught me that and gave me the drive and goals I needed that have helped me succeed in life. I remember how hard math was for me in high school, but I had to take a remedial class in the Navy prior to Basic Electricity/Electronics school. It was an Algebra/Trigonometry class. The way they taught it made it easy - I still remember how to use it even now.

My own experience with ADD is that it is complete BS drummed up by doctors - I've had no less than 6 students when I was still teaching Martial Arts that were diagnosed with ADD or ADHD, and were on Ritalin. All of them were able to discontinue using it after several months. Why? They finally had an outlet for their energy, and a mental focus that wasn't there before. If ADD was a disease or problem they had, then where did it go? Did it magically disappear? Or more likely it never existed to begin with.

My point is that if your son can stay in, then the Navy will likely be the biggest life altering change for the better he can ever have. Recruiters only tell people not to disclose things if they actually know that it doesn't make any difference to the person's career or enlistment processing. They're not stupid, and remember that anything your Son has done, regardless of what he was told, it's still his responsibility. There is no way around that except to accept it, and move on.

While it made me feel better, years later I realized that if I had said nothing it would've made no difference at all. That was my worry, and it was needless. Boot Camp is a mind game, and that's one of the first ones they test you on.