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Why does it hurt so much to get over a relationship gone wrong and why does everyone who knew you have to tell you they see him and his new girlfriend?

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2011-09-13 23:54:20
2011-09-13 23:54:20

it hurts because youc care. this is the sucky part about getting over someone. when our emotions are involved full throttle, we don't think about our feelings being hurt. unfortuntaely that's how life goes. there was probably someone you had in your life before and broke up with who felt the same way with you. and for the people that keep telling you about his new girlfriend are not friends anyway. if they were they would consider your feelings and allow you to find out for yourself when the time was right. why would they need to tell you about something like that knowing its going to hurt! ctr

AnswerI am really sorry that you have to go through the pain of this, but most of have had to deal with this once (if that helps you any.) It's difficult having a relationship with someone and thinking they love you back only to find out they don't. It hurts our self esteem, our dignity, but it should NEVER stop you from finding the right person that should be in your life (this guy is not the one.) Why do your friends give you the blow-by-blow descriptions re the fact he has a new girlfriend .... they're cruel and I suggest you "clean out your closet" (as I call it) and find better friends that care about your feelings. The normal thing to do is not mention his name to you or if they have seen him with someone else. It's hurtful to you, so, I doubt they are going to be good friends of yours.

Some people just don't think, while others get great satisfaction of living off your pain. This is all the more reason "to clean out your closet" of these so-called friends.

Never give up! I know I've lost two great loves in my life, wemt through the pain I shouldn't have to be going through and left wondering what I did wrong. In most cases it's nothing you did wrong at all, but it all comes down to chemistry as to how two people stay together for the rest of their lives.

The upside of this is that in my 63 years I've learned that no matter how painful these events are there is a good reason. Just think, what if you ended up marrying this guy and he ended up cheating on you or decided he wanted a divorce. He has wasted a lot of your life, but the way it happened to you is a "learning tool" so you will take the next relationship a little slower and easier and get to know more about the person before you commit. We all have to do that if we want to find that special someone. If you were tied up with this guy, you'd never be taking that adventurous road that will lead you to the guy you really should be with. Please trust me on this.

NEVER let any man hold you down. Grieve for a bit, then pick yourself up, dust yourself off and make changes in your life. Really look at these so-called friends in your life and remember, if you are good friends you don't try to hurt them by telling them things they have heard or seen re your ex boyfriend. There are no excuses on this subject and it's just put down to "mean and cruel." There are so many interesting people out there, so keep a few of your close friends, find new ones as well, get back on your feet and start dating again. The pain doesn't last forever.

Good luckMarcy

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