How long do widowers need to grieve before they feel ready to date if this particular man lost his wife in a tragic car accident and has young children?

Answer 1

Each person that grieves marches to the beat of a different drummer, and no one should decide when and if this person has finished grieving. Some people never get over losing their mate and never remarry while others do. This husband and father not only has to get over the grief of losing his wife so unexpectedly, but has a great responsibility of raising young children. Young children also go through a terrible trauma of losing one or both parents and if they are very small it is still hard, but when 6 and older it's devastating, so not only does dad have to cope with his own feelings, he also has to hide some of those feelings to help his children through a very rough time in their lives. Bringing a new woman into the picture at this time is not a good idea. You just don't replace those you love and lost so easily. All family and friends can do is offer support and answer questions if he has any and basically keep the poor guy on an even keel. Drop in at least once a week and see if he needs help with the children or cleaning house, etc. There should be no strings attached to this deal either. Don't be surprised if the children cling to their father so perhaps get him out on outings with the children in tow. Most people forget that children who have lost one parent are extremely fearful of losing the other parent so it will take some time for the father to get back to a good work schedule. After all, these children lost their mother and having a housekeeper or even a babysitter or Child Care is frightening for the children if introduced into their lives at too early a stage. Time does heal, but at a different pace for each person. Let this man make his own decisions once he is over his grief. Marcy