What should you do if you've been married 24 years and have 4 kids but your wife takes no interest in you or your sex life and you feel rejected every night but she won't talk about it?

Answer 1

Believe it or not this is a very common problem with married couples who have children. Raising 4 children is very difficult at best, and your wife's life is very busy and exhausting. It's difficult for the wife to have another life when there are children. It doesn't matter how old your children are, the mother constantly worries about her children and they are still "her babies." Some mothers prefer to go out and work at least part-time so they can feel useful, help earn money for the household. Raising children isn't given near enough credit. So, think of this ... although I am sure you have your bad days at work, you still get to mingle with other people, feel you have contributed something and are trying hard to support your family. Your wife is chasing children around or worrying about teens, little time to be with friends, too exhausted to have people over, and also, if most women are honest they will admit that sex is the last thing on their mind when they are tired. Men on the other hand can "feel like it" any old time. I suggest, if you can, to make arrangements with someone in the family or a close and trusted friend to take your children for a week (if they are quite young or even if they are teenagers. Then sit down with your wife and plan out a vacation. Somewhere romantic and where she can just lay back and relax and be waited on. It's good for both of you. You don't have to go to Hawaii, etc., to do this and can find beautiful Bed & Breakfasts all over the place. Go near the ocean as it's so soothing. Perhaps take in some night life and dance your feet off. Either that or give her the choice to choose a girlfriend and pay for a nice mini holiday so she can get away from everything and put her feet up. There is also the possibility that your wife is into peri menopause or menopause. In peri menopause women's periods can fluctuate and they can get hot flashes, feel depressed and are very moody. With menopause a woman stops her periods and the old hormones do a real number on you. She may need to see the doctor as she could feel depressed, and needs some help adjusting those hormones. When you approach her about this be delicate about this. Tell her you love her, want to see her happy, but she has to talk to you so you can be there for her. I highly doubt your wifes moods are because she doesn't love you. She's tired, probably depressed and doesn't know what she wants out of life. Going back to work part-time or takes some classes at college may make her feel better. To her, you and the children have a life, and I bet she is feeling pretty left out. Keep trying to talk to her, and if she keeps refusing then get tough and tell her you love her, want to help her, but you can't live like this and won't put up with it. This may be enough to shock her into doing something to improve her own mood. Whatever you do, don't make this whole thing about sex. Realize how deep her feelings go and that she needs something out of life too. Good luck Marcy Wow, that was a GREAT answer! WOW SOMEONE IN MY POSITION IM A FEMALE JUST MARRIED HAVE 4 KIDS AND I TELL YA MY HUSBAND WONT GIVE IT UP BUT HE WILL GET ON internet AND LOOK AT OTHER WOMEN AND DO HIS THING INSTEAD OF ME WHATS WITH THAT BOY I KNOW HOW THIS FEELS