What is the best little johnny joke?

Answer 1

This one right here:

Little Johnny was 7 years old, and like other boys his age he was rather curious. He has been hearing stuff at school about courting and he finally built up the courage to question his mother about this subject. instead of explaining thing to little johnny she told him to watch his older sister and her boyfriend from behind the curtains. this he did and the following morning he told his mother every thing that happened.:

"sis and her boyfriend talked for a while then he turned all the lights off and started to kiss her and hug her. i figured that sis must have been getting sick because she started to make a funny face. he must have thought that to because he put his hand up her shirt and felt her heart. but he wasn't a doctor, because he was having trouble finding her heart. he must have been getting sick to because pretty soon both of them started panting and getting all out of breath. his other hand must have been getting cold because he put it up her skirt. about this time sis was starting to get to the end of the couch. this is when the fever came, because sis told him that she was really HOT. Finally i found out what was making them so sick.......... a big eel had somehow gotten into his pants. it jumped out and there it stood 9 in. tall. HONEST! anyway he gabbed it with one hand to keep it from getting away. when sis saw it her eyes got real big and her mouth fell open and she started calling out to god and stuff like that. i should tell her about the ones i saw at the beach last week. sis got brave and tried to kill it by biting its head off. all of a sudden she made a noise and backed off... i guess if must have bitten her back. then she grabbed it with both hands and her boyfriend slipped a muzzle over it to keep it from biting again. sis lay back and spread her legs apart so she could get a scissor lock on it. and he helped by laying on top of it. the eel put up a hell of a fight. sis started groaning and squealing, and her boyfriend almost upset the couch. i guess they wanted to kill the ell by squishing it between them. after a while they both quit and gave a great sigh. her boyfriend sat up and sure enough it was dead there it lay limp on the couch, i knew it was dead because its insides were hanging out. sis and her boyfriend were tired from the battle but they went on courting anyway. he started hugging and kissing her again and by golly it jumped up again. i figured that eels must be like cat, they have nine lives or something. this time sis got up and tried to kill it by sitting on it. after about 35 mins. of struggling, they finally killed the eel i knew it was dead because this time i saw sis's boyfriend peel its skin off and flush it down the toilet!" *mother fainted*