As people grow older how does their role in the family change?

Answer 1

At all ages, the roles of individuals change within the family.

Children from birth to the age of majority (18-21) are supposed to be nutured, protected, and cared for by their parents.

As a normal developmental stage, teenagers begin breaking away from their parents' control and protection. Teens want to be "independent" and often feel more mature and capable than they may be in fact.

At the same time, parents also begin the process of changing how they deal with their teenagers. This is often a difficult period for both teens and parents as they butt heads with each other over everything from clothing to dating to school and home responsibilities. As a result of the process, parents prepare mentally and emotionally for the "child" to leave home and assume the role of a young adult.

During the young adult years, many kids may hold onto "rebellion" and conflict with parents. During their 20s and 30s, young adults must figure out how to make their own lives and own families. Their parents may be estranged, or may be close to the young adult during this time.

When "kids" in their 20s or 30s finally have their own children (or mature enough), they often begin to resolve many of the conflicts with their own parents which began during the teen years. Young adults realize that parenting isn't easy, and that often parents make choices between "a not great option" and another, equally "not so great option". Rather than continuing to blame their parents for shortcomings and mistakes, young adults find themselves turning back to their parents for advice or comfort. For example, during a major disappointment, a daughter of 32 yrs may turn to her mother for comfort, despite years of less than ideal interactions between them. A man may turn more to his dad for business advice or after failures.

At the same time that "kids" are in their 30s and 40s, parents are aging. Some parents become ill or disabled and need their adult children's help. Many adult childrem resent or avoid taking responsibility for an aging (but still young) parent. The "child" feels torn between living his or her own life, establishing a career, dealing with their own family problems, etc.

But, again, nature directs the dance of interactions between parents and kids. All parents age; all parents eventually need their children to help them. Some adult kids adapt easily to the reversed role (becoming protector to a parent) while others resent and avoid the parent's needs. If the parents remain together, they often take care of each other until the situation needs additional help. At that point, adult kids either step in to take a parent or parent into the "child's" home, or some adults put their parents in nursing homes.

Parents also often become grandparents (child: ages 20-40; parent-now-grandparent, 40s to 60s or older). Many "kids" need their parents' help -- grandparents take on roles from babysitter to taxi driver to transport grandchildren to and from activities.

The US Census shows that more and more, grandparents raise the grandchildren completely because the parents cannot. Often this is because the parent is incarcerated, on drugs, is an alcoholic, or is physically ill or has died or both parents have problems. The aging grandparent must parent the grandchildren, despite grandparents often having many physical problems. The Census shows most of the grandparents struggle physically and financially during the years of becoming a custodial grandparent, and the "Golden Years" are far from golden.

This is much different from past decades when grandparents had more of a role as "babysitter" or "entertainer" with grandkids. Time with grandparents used to be more intermittent, with the parents raising their kids.

As the aging parents continue to get older, they assume more of a position as a "wise advisor" to adult children and grandchildren (unless the aging parent has a mental illness or disease affecting the brain). Both children and grandchildren turn to the parent//grandparent more and more for advice and historical perspective about human nature and life problems.

Again, at the same time that parents are becoming elderly, their children have now passed middle age. The time around 50-years old creates a changing time for adults, who realize over half of their own lives is now gone; they may only have another 30 years to live. If the "child" has not died before the parent, the child must now face the deaths of aging parents, often after long periods of illness or infirmity. The over-50 child begins to realize that an invisible "baton" has passed to them---they are now the "wise advisor" of their family, especially if their own parents and grandparents have died....

And through every decade, the life cycle continues.... babies are born, children become teens and hate their parents, they reconcile at least in some ways with their parents, they have their own families and kids, the "once kid" now becomes the grandparent and "wise advisor", while the next generation already born begin the same cycle of life.....

Answer 2

As people grow older, their role in the family may shift from being dependent on their parents or older relatives to becoming more independent and taking on caregiving responsibilities for their own children or elderly parents. Older individuals may also become the family's source of wisdom and guidance, providing support and advice to younger generations.