How do you leave your abusive husband when you have three boys to look after and are afraid your husband will go nuts and will he get the house and cars if you leave?

Answer 1

Definitely seek help from the Battered Wives Hotline. These are trained prof. who are experienced in these situations and know exactly how to help! People donate all kinds of things to help women in your exact situation. Things from financial help, right down to legal help. They even have prof. to help the children through this difficult situation. Consult them first and ask for their guidance. Answer Great idea! I think that you now realize you cannot make the changes you need to alone. Giving up the need to be in charge and to solve it yourself is useful, since you may not be feeling the best about yourself at the moment. Find a good, solid person who has lived through this and follow their advice. Do not "yes, but" any of their advice. Just follow it to the best of your ability.

The kids are important and you definitely want to set an example for them that abuse is not acceptable--you don't want them to get caught in the cycle for their lives. Find a safe place, get child support in place and then worry about the split. What you want is to be financially independent so that he cannot control your life.

Some things you can do are to get a job, start putting money aside and find a place to live that you can afford. The house and cars are just stuff. A private bank account, and post office box are integral to your success. Be careful about acting at all different while you are doing this and don't let the kids know until you are ready to fly--your chances of being harmed increase the closer you get to leaving. BTW, I did this a number of years ago and did not ever look back. Life is so much better!