If you're in love with a married man is he lying if he tells you that you'll be together soon?

Answer 1

Only about 1% of married men will actually leave their wife and marry the mistress. They will either stay with their wife or leave her and stay with you for a little and then move on or perhaps he may not even come directly to you. Time to get your dignity back and kick this one to the curb. I wouldn't respect anyone that cheats on their mate (that includes women) and hasn't got the guts to ask for a divorce. You are heading for a lot of hurt.

AnswerI am involved with a married man. I have dealt with this alone for over a year and I as well have been promised ' he will leave soon'. But I do not think it is lying. I can see the challenges /guilt/ obligation etc he is under but I do not intend on hanging around while he mustere up the courage. I definitely have a kind of ultimatum. From the beginning I never intended on sharing him. I thought we would be soley together from the first time but we both work on ships and are apart for sveral months at a time and he is in Norway and I am in Canada. The odds are heavily against us but we are very very much in love and I have great faith that we will be together within the next couple months. He has been in an unsatisfying marriage for over 20 years. I have a huge amount of empathy and guilt over his wife. It really bothers me alot. I dream about her almost every night and I hate myself for what I have done and what she doesnt know but at the same time I believe it is he who should be dealing with her and having integrity and guts to cut her free even though he worries that she will lose it and go down. Anyway enough ranting. But I do not believe that a married man is lying just by saying that....although many may be, it is not a rule.

I wouldn't say that he is lying. I am dating a married man also. Me and him broke up in November of last year and we got back together in February of this year. But while we weren't together he got his wife pregnant and then she emailed me and told me about it. He didn't know about her being pregnant until I told him. So he says that he can't leave right now because of that reason and I believe him. You have to live your life for you noone else. You can take advice from other people but the sole choice lies with you and what decision you want to make. Only you know what you can and can't handle and how much you are willing to take. Good Luck.....

***I have to comment here. Most married men cheat on their wives because they either are cheaters by heart or they aren't getting what they want/need at home. Obviously, every situation is different, as every man is different. I'm 40 years old and had my share of men, single and married. I prefer dating married men! Mostly because they appreciate a woman who gives them attention and in turn have treated me very nicely. I am currently involved with a married man by choice. He is the sweetest most generous man I've been with to date. He has promised me many things, one in which he will leave his wife. Last night he told her he wanted a divorce, today he is flying out to be with me for the next 2 weeks. I am a home wrecker, whether I want to believe otherwise or not. I may not be the reason their marriage is on the rock, but the moment I am involved with a married man, I am a slutty home wrecker living in denial if I say no. I curse myself and my entire family to death every single day so that the generation of home wreckers could disappear. So please, stop wrecking homes. If he's having an affair, you're the home wrecker.