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What else can I help you with?
Why do abuse books suggest that the victim get counseling to deal with the abuse when it is obvious that the victim will never be truly happy until the abuser is out of their life?
Most books tell you to leave the abuser and then get the counseling. That's what Abused Women's Centers are for. They not only give the victim a safe place to stay, but help them get on their feet by going to court (if need be re their abuser) fight for custody of their children, and help them find a job. In payment for this they expect the victim to do their part by learning about the Cycle of Abuse and also taking their programs so the victim will not go back to her abuser or, will not choose another abusive mate. These groups are wonderful because it puts the victim in a group of other abused women and they don't feel so alone in their plight. One can read all the books they want, but I call it "arm chair psychiatry" and the victim has to be serious enough to really want to get out of the relationship and thus, "The Abused Women's Centers." Marcy Sometimes abuse has left the victim's self-esteem in such a bad state that the victim has no courage or energy left anymore to leave or to make any other important decisions. As abuse is all about control, it's important that the victim starts to feel in control and empowered. Leaving the abuser must be her decision, no-one else's. For many victims, leaving also means financial hardship, divorce and custody proceedings etc. It is not easy to leave, and the victim will certainly need all her courage to end the cycle.
Can an abuse victim get to a point where they seem to be emulating the abuser without realizing it when they just have had enough of being manipulated and controlled and are starting to fight back?
Even a mild-mannered person (male/female) can be cornered one too many times and come out fighting. If it's mental abuse arguing pursues, but if the victim has been physically abused she will probably end up the loser in the fight to save herself. The only recourse is to plan her escape and head for the first Abused Women Center in her area, or, press charges against her abuser and be sure she is not in the same home with him when he's arrested. Yes, victims of abuse can emulate their abuser in their own minds, and, if they can free themselves of their abuser and start another life, without counseling this person can become abusive to a new partner, their children or friends. Marcy
Who was the first victim of freedom fight?
mangal pandey
Is it common for an abuse victim to reach a point where they start doing the very things that they know will infuriate their abuser because the literature on abuse stresses holding him accountable?
It doesn't make much sense for one's own mental health to start mirroring the abuse. At the least, it will escalate the situation rather than reducing the abuse in the family. Also, it does more harm to do something, like act abusive, that is against your nature and beliefs. It is healthier to act "congruently" with your real self and not have to fake behavior and thinking. Better to realize that you cannot change another person without their agreement and cooperation and move on. It will do the abuser no harm and it may in the end be more helpful. If it's mental abuse yes, if it's physical abuse it's not common. When someone uses mental abuse to control their partner the victim may take it for years, but somewhere along the line over 80% of victims will snap and start fighting back. Hopefully in most cases they will have had enough, stop fighting with the mental abuser and move on. In physical abuse most victims are terrified of their abuser and are more apt to try to please the abuser. Some women may fight back, but they only end up the loser. Then there are some women that will find an escape and head for an Abused Women's Center where there is much help and protection for the victim. Other women unfortunately will stay in this abusive relationship until the abuser decides to leave, or death can occur from one too many beatings. It is not up to the victim of mental or physical abuse to hold their abuser accountable and this is one for the professionals in psychology. Seldom will men go for psychological counseling because they don't see themselves as abusers and are too used to blaming others (especially their victim(s)) for making them the way they are. Marcy
What was the plot in twilight?
In short: A boy and a girl fall in love, but the girl discovers that he is actually a vampire. They struggle to maintain a normal relationship while they fight the threat of the human girl falling victim to other hungry vampires.
Is it normal for newlyweds to fight a lot?
It is normal for newlyweds to fight as they face many stressful situations and important decisions to be made. However, it is probably not normal for a newlywed couple to fight a lot and over every little thing.
How can someone who is either considering leaving her abuser or sending him to an abuser program protect herself from paybacks or retaliation so that she can rest assured that she did the right thing?
Once you leave your abuser put it in your mind that you are leaving him for good! There is no going back! Few abusers ever seek psychological help because they truly believe there is nothing wrong with them and no one is going to tell them otherwise. Some abusers will even fight the police and still swing at their victim while the police are standing right there. Abusers think they own their victim and that there are no authority figures that should be meddling in the abuser's personal affairs. YOU don't send the abuser to a program because he has to want to go. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink. If he agrees to go he's pulling your chain! Abusers are sneaky and sick individuals and by believing he will go for help and you are still living there you are putting your life at risk. Physical abuse is not to be taken lightly and women are murdered for a lot less. Leave! Find out where your local "Abused Women's Center" is, or contact Mental Health and they will put you in the right direction. Not only does your abuser need help, but you have been psychologically bruised and you need some help in healing as well before you can expect to have a productive lifestyle. Good luck hon and be careful! Marcy
Is it normal for Oscar fish to fight?
Yes it is.
Is it normal for newts to fight when introduced?
no :P
Where do normal tigers like to fight?
In the wild.
Why do abused teens feel the need to fight the abuser ALL the time even if they're not doing anything?
Anger. Often it's a response to feelings of rejection, equating the abuse with a sense of being emotionally rejected by the abuser. Anger is a common response by a depressed individual. Especially depressed males.
Is there any way to make sure that an abuser will not follow through on his threats if you don't fight him tooth and nail?
Please go onto www.google.com Type in: What is the Cycle of Abuse? You need to read how an abuser thinks and acts and why they do these things. Some men come from an abusive environment (and some women) and some men have had experiences in life where they become so frustrated with life and life's situations they become abusive and some men are just plain mean to the bone. Abusers are about threats, violence, getting even with their victim and yes, they can well follow through on their threats. Abusers like total control and even if the victim allows themselves to be controlled it's never good enough. They simply become the lashing post for a very mentally disturbed individual .. the abuser! Abused women can contact Mental Health to find out where their local Abused Women's Centers are. If the victim decides to set herself free from her abuser then she is placed into a "safe house" (the abuser can't find them) and she will be expected to take programs on abuse and how to become her own person and realize the danger signs of abusive men and women. She will also get legal counsel for any court case that may come up against her abuser (if she wishes to press charges) and if children are involved the counselor will also go into court to help the woman fight for full custody of those children. Women or men should never be treated with mental/physical abuse and we are all free to make our own choices. Relationships are about being not only each others lover, but best friends and it's about honesty, respect, and encouragement. Living in fear is worse than being in prison. At least in prison you have a schedule to follow and know if you do something wrong you will be punished, but if you keep your nose clean you may make it out alive. With abused women it doesn't matter how they act because it just will never please the abuser. Good luck hon Marcy
