Is it ok for your children to meet your soon to be ex husbands new girlfriend who will be living with your ex soon?

Answer 1

Yes, its ok, it sounds like they are in a serious relationship and they should be told very gently. Im sure they are aware of the divorce. You sit down with them and age appropriately, tell them that parents move on with their personal lives and find other adults to be involved with and in a few days you will be meeting so/so. Answer any questions they have and this should be done with both you and your ex there, not the girlfriend yet. You do not bad mouth her, in front of them, and you let him answer the questions about her but the two of you answer the questions about why it is going to be like this. Explain that nothing about the family love/structure will change, that you are just going to be including dad's girlfriend in some but not ALL the family functions. She doesnt have to go to the school events, right away, nor does she belong at their birthday parties, right away, either. The two of you have to consider their feelings and in the beginning things like that need to focus on them and not on your husbands new life. Also explain that you will be meeting someone someday and when you do that they will have to show the same respect for you and your newly found partner. Tell them how much you both love them, that is nothing they did, that people sometimes grow apart, that you are and always will be a family, only the living arrangements have changed....Good luck, stay cool and be civil. All the better for the kids and dont be a door mat to anyone's manipulation, including the kids.