What are some bad ways to stop bullying?

Answer 1

1. Zero-tolerance policies. These also make it impossible for victims to defend themselves, and these policies are used to punish the victims.

2. Singling out groups and offering anti-bullying support by group rather than equally and for all. If you elevate any one group to a protected class, then you are actually setting them up to be disrespected and subject to MORE bullying. The help may be misinterpreted as special treatment. Very often, group-specific anti-bullying programs often target the least practiced forms of bullying. For instance, while sexual orientation bullying is a problem, it is not as common as other types, such are bullying related to race, religion, creed, intelligence, appearance, or weight. So it would be better to not allow any form of bullying rather than to only address certain kinds while allowing others.

3. Bullying back. Every once in a while, a teacher gets fired for biting a kid who bites others, and every once in a while, someone goes to prison for sexually assaulting a rapist. If a bully bullies because they were bullied, then further victimizing them won't help.

4. Increasing policies that actually cause the bullying. People sometimes bully when they feel a lack of control and power in their lives. Stealing power from them and making them feel more helpless won't make it go away.

5. Promoting wrong behavior of whatever group. If someone's chosen behavior sets them up to be bullied, then promoting that behavior won't help them in the long run. That behavior should neither be practiced nor used as an excuse to bully. One person's wrong does not excuse another's regardless of what class or group they are in.

6. Victim blaming. There are studies about how victims of bullying seem to share certain "flaws." That is tantamount to blaming the victims for it and isn't much different than saying a woman who was assaulted should have dressed differently or went outside at a different time. That is certainly not fair. Maybe they should have done something different, but that is independent of the other person's actions and is not an excuse for their behavior.

7. Ignoring it. Just because someone is a valuable person at some level, that doesn't make it any better or mean it should be ignored. At schools, it is often the cheerleaders, athletes, teacher's assistants, coaches, etc. who are behind it. But when "indispensable" people are guilty, those in charge often are quick to cover it up, ignore it, or blame/threaten the victims. Ignoring it only reinforces it, it is not a "one-off" situation that will go away on its own.