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Don't mention the words "best friend" when discussing your new friend to your best buddy. Best friends are worked at, so if this friend is new in your life you are simply "friends" for now and reassure your best friend that they are simply just that. Slowly introduce your new friend to her/him, but be sure your new friend isn't always around and you do a few things with your best friend. If this is not working then you are going to have to have a talk with her/him and let them know they are not going to be leading your life. All of us have many friends on different plateau's. We have acquaintances, then friends we see more often and then there are a few very close friends and finally the "best friend." Each friend should be treated with respect, but that doesn't mean one of those friends should ever dictate to you how to live and who to choose as friends. 20 years ago I had a best friend (we met when she was ill) so we were very close. Then we had new neighbors move next door to our house. They were a young married couple and I became friends with the wife. It was easier to see her of course because they were next door and we'd get together fairly often on the weekends. The odd time her and her husband would come over for a evening. My best friend finally admitted she was extremely jealous of this girl. Since I hadn't dumped my best friend and frequently went out with her, I honestly didn't feel this fair, so I had a talk with her. I slowly introduced her to my new friend and had them both over at times and they seemed to get along. In time, my best friend decided that she didn't want to share me with someone else and demanded I give my friend up. I refused and told her straight up that she was not going to control my life, that she would always be my best friend and no one could take the place of her. There was a period after that where my best friend refused to see me, but, again, in time she started to come around and I just kept her from my new friend so there would be no hard feelings. I also learned a lesson and was more aware of what I was doing so I wouldn't hurt my best friend. Best friends are simply fearful that they will be left out and forgotten and it's true that in some cases this can happen. It's a balancing act, but one many of us will have to do. When we are always around our best friend there are many great fun memories that make an imprint on both, and your best friend couldn't stand to lose you. Good luck Marcy

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Q: What can you do if your best friend gets jealous if you hang around with other people but you want to have two best friends but she would be jealous?
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