I don't think you should if you weren't invited to the wedding.
In polite society, gifts are NOT to be expected. If you want to send a gift it is up to you whether you get an invitation or not.
If you are invited to a wedding it is normal (but should not be expected or compulsory) to give the newlyweds a gift to help them start off their married life. If you are not attending the wedding but are friends (or family) of the couple (they are dear to you) then a gift is still a nice gesture (they may not be able to afford a big wedding so do not be insulted if you are not invited). If you hardly know the couple then sending them a card will be fine. Finally, at a wedding the focus should be on the ceremony of the marriage not the gifts or the party, maybe we are becoming too materialistic!
* If you know the couple fairly well and had to decline for a good reason then yes, etiquette steps in here and you should send them a wedding gift. You could send them a wedding card with a gift certificate in it to one of the stores that they are registered at. You can get this information from the bride's mother.
it depends on how you find out about the party
* You usually tick off on the RSVP card enclosed with the invitation and if you are concerned the employee will be hurt slip a note in and give some excuse as to why you can't make it. The decent thing to do would be at least buy her and her husband to be a wedding gift.
no
You are never required to give a gift. If you don't go, you MAY send something, but you don't have to. Many people wait and give a gift when the baby is born.
You generally send a wedding gift to the bride's home and the address where gifts are to be sent is the return address on the envelope re the wedding invitation.
Yes. Very.
Bring a card or small token gift.
If you attend the wedding or the reception you should give a gift. It's not required and you don't have to give anything if you don't want to. ---- In polite society, gifts are NOT to be expected. Giving a gift is optional whether you received a gift from them or not, whether you go to the reception or not. The invitation is to join them in celebrating the event.
* Yes, if a married couple are renewing their vows then a gift should be given unless the invitation has stated that no gifts be given.
* Yes, this would be acceptable in today's etiquette and a relief for many guests as it will be easier on them. In your wedding invitation put a money card inside for the convenience of your guests.
AnswerIf was not done by a formal invitation, in print and sent through the mail, you are not obligated to send anything at all. Usually, the return address will be on the reply envelop so you could send something if you choose to. When a oral invitation to a wedding is given its usually an after thought and I find it highly insulting, sometimes people do that to fish for a gift. IF you do choose to send a gift, the proper thing would be is to find out from the parents where the daughter will be residing after getting married and send the gift there because you dont send a gift before a wedding, its after you know that the wedding actually occurred and curiously, have you been invited to the bridal shower as well? That too should tell you of their considerations for you.
Set up a gift registry and put the details on the invitation.
When someone puts that on a wedding invitation, it's effectively saying, "you don't need to bring a gift". On the other hand, if they are a young, struggling couple, bring a gift of something that will help them get established. If you choose to, present it discreetly to avoid embarrassment to other guests who did not do so and to avoid seeming to show off.