I think that even though the narcissist knows that you care for them, they can't help but sabatoge a potentially good and healthy relationship with someone who is trustworthy because they are not comfortable with a stable, secure person. They are more comfortable and "at home" with someone who is sure to betray and reject them. Narcissists don't care if you still need THEM -- its whether or not they still need YOU or not. Narcissists feed off of people and get what they want and move on to the next victim. They rarely care who they've left behind or damaged. A friend of mine was involved with a Narcissist. My friend is tall, blonde, attractive and intelligent. Men fall all over her. She's a real catch. The Narcissist used her and moved on even though she really loved him and treated him like a king. Go figure. She was stunned and hurt. So was everyone else. Especially guys who'd tried to win her over and "lost" her to this Narcissist moron. YOU DID NOTHING WRONG so if you're asking yourself why you didn't do more or love this person more, etc., STOP. Narcissists only care about what they can get, who they can control and what's in it for them. You just happened to be there. You deserve better.
I can only tell you what I've seen and it goes something like this: The narcissist almost works on making sure you DO adore him and then, it's boring whilst at the same time giving him the perfect ego trip to let you go. YOU were devestated over him. HE got over you long long time ago, if he was really into you (or anyone else) at all. I've seen a narcissist laugh at the thought that he's about to walk out of (and he did) of a relationship whilst telling me that she was madly in love with him. The thought that you would go nuts over him when he leaves you (and most do) gives him pleasure. Once they've had their supply it's see ya later but always when it suits them, which is mostly when you're in love or committed. That makes it all the more pleasurable for them. It takes time to accept and heal from this because quite frankly it's so damaging. So take your're time and allow how your feel come to the surface otherwise the healing process may take years and years.
It depends if she still has any ongoing use as an aid to boosting his self(ish) image. The likelihood is that he will drop her now he has 'conquered ' her. Personally, I would question why anyone would want to let someone they consider a narcissist to get anywhere near them. I also wouldn't give in to get rid of him either - that is degrading and soul-destroying.
Please let me apologize in advance for my sarcasm, but I wish this were always the case! If all the narcissists paired up, then they would leave all us normal folks alone... Seriously, I did read somewhere (in Sam Vaknin's site?) that there are two particular "types" of narcissists may do well for a time...Was it an inverted narcissist he was refering to? I don't quite remember.(Google: "inverted narcissist maybe?) I also read that there are folks out there that actually like being in a relationship with a narcissist!
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