If you really do know, why do you need her to confirm it for you? do you want details? why put yourself through the pain.. You can't make someone say something if they don't want to. I think that you should be deciding what you are going to do about it. If she has had an affair, can you forgive her and move on? Hire a private detective to find out if she is telling you the truth. If she is not you can then confornt her with the proof e.g. photos.
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