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It is a very hard thing to do. Your spouse bottom line was unfaithful. Marriage is a covenant; a promise between two people to be faithful and love each other. If your spouse cheats then they have broken their side of the covenant, meaning you shouldn't have to keep holding onto to your end either.

It hurts to know that someone you love felt intimate about someone else; showing an expression of love and affection such as that to someone else.

I'm not sure if this is the case, but sometimes incidents happen when there is alcohol or some drug abuse involved; but it means they were not being considerate or responsible. Think about the fact that many people can still resist things that are wrong when they were drunk or high. But it does explain less of a sense of good judgement.

Something that no person wants to be is second best to someone they love, especially if they are in a commitment with that person; which in the normal case of having an affair, that is what the spouse becomes. And that is what the spouse made you was second best; you wouldn't want to always be that even if the spouse does remain faithful to you after the affair.

The cheating spouse was NOT the victim; the faithful spouse is. It is your decision whether or not to take pity on this. I'd say take these things into consideration when you think about whether or not you can actually make a healthy marriage out of that situation. And if you can I highly suggest marriage counseling. It is a good thing to have someone there helping and listening to your problems then laying them out for you so you can see it clearly and really get a feel for the situation.

Anyway, Good Luck :)

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Q: How do you lead a good married life after your spouse had an affair?
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