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How do you save your 13-year marriage if you love your wife and you have 3 kids and you had an affair 7 years ago but your wife is having an affair now?

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2005-11-02 22:38:28
2005-11-02 22:38:28

This is a very common problem and there isn't a thing you can say about it. It's obvious you have marriage problems so you are going to have to be strong and sit down with your wife and tell her that you both need to go for marriage counseling. If she doesn't agree, then tell her that you're leaving. Because you have broken that trusted vow of honesty and loyalty you have few tools to use on your side of this problem. All the two of you are doing is hurting each other. Either try the marriage counselor or split-up, but don't waste your life or hers living in a worthless relationship. Good luck Marcy

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Leave him and her behind. If they wanted to be with each other they should have come to you and told you about their affair and not keep it in the dark. Seek a lawyers advice on divorce. Your marriage to me is not salvageable because of the length of the affair and the fact that there is now a love child involved.

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35 years of marriage means coral.

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First of all, have you asked him why? Something is definitely wrong with this. Think back as to what happened at this time. Could he be having an affair? Is this possible? Does he have a lot of spare time by himself?

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If your husband has never had an affair before this then no, you should not leave him. Some men 40 plus go through 'Andropause' (some men different than others) which is similar to women's menopause. The man can be moody; depressed and feels old and would like to reach back into his past to see if he is still attractive to the opposite sex and all the while they are unaware of what an affair will do their wife if she should find out. Although cheating is never right 'to err is human.' If you and your husband can sit down and communicate to improve your marriage or see a marriage counselor that is better than ending 30 years of marriage. There are many people who have gone through what you are going through and their marriage has become stronger.

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Zachery and Riva Tims ended their 15-year-marriage in July of 2009, two years after Zachery admitted the affair with stripper Judy Nguyen.

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she never had an affair she has been to the same guy for many many years

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It means he is having his cake and eating it. If you are the 'other woman' you need toforget about him, he will never leave his wife, and why should two of you be miserable? He is a selfish narcissist who just wants it all. Marriage is about commitment. If he can

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If you have tried counseling, then maybe there is nothing left to save. If you are a person of faith, try praying for guidance.

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Individuals, who run from one relationship to another, usually never find what they are looking for in that other person. Having an affair with someone is significantly different from actually living with that person. The sexual excitement of the relationship usually becomes dull and boring after a couple of years.

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To be honest, if it was the first one, you should give him another chance, and if it doesn't work out again, then just ditch him. Also if the affair happened early out in the marriage (1-5 Years of being Married/Together) then I personally think that he would most likely do it again.

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