What would you order in a kosher restaurant?

Answer 1

We surmise from the question that it comes from someone unfamiliar with kosher

restaurants, and perhaps with "Jewish" food in general. For that individual, the

process would be identical to the experience of visiting any other ethnic restaurant

with which he may be unfamiliar, and might go something like this:

-- Enter the establishment. If it's a walk-in, working-class establishment, look around,

decide where you'd like to sit, and do so. If it's a high-class joint, smile and greet the

greeter, and give your name if you have a reservation.

-- Read the menu. The restaurant may be located in an enclave where the ethnic

population is so dense that its business rests almost exclusively on the Jewish

market. Their menu may be no more than a list of titles, naming dishes that the

typical customer will know very well, and conceivably printed in a foreign script.

This is everything you're worried about. It's obviously your worst nightmare, and

the odds of walking into a situation like this are nearly zero. Besides, if you did, you

certainly would not be there alone ... you'd be there with a buddy who could walk you

through it.

It's much more likely that the restaurant caters to the general public, including non-

as well as Jewish, offering its Jewish clientele kosher versions of dishes that are

popular in the local world at large but which they can't walk in and order anywhere

else. The menu is in English, and each item on it ... especially the ones with a Jewish

traditional title ... is accompanied by a brief description of what's in it and what it's

all about.

If your choice isn't immediately obvious, or you can't narrow it down to less than two

or three, or you see an item that especially intrigues you because you have no clue

as to what it's talking about, then help is never more than a table away in a kosher

Jewish restaurant. Ask the customer at the next table, or ask anybody who works there,

and you will have more help than you can handle.

Finally, you don't want to embarass yourself by trying to order something that's

not kosher, or by accidentally revealing the fact that you don't uderstand kosher

altogether. Right ?

You do not have a problem! First of all, there are plenty of Jews who don't

understand kosher altogether either. In the current situation, it is not a liability.

It's an asset, and you should use it that way. Try to come off as something you're

not, and you will fail and embarass yourself. Go in proudly and unabashedly as

a person who has no idea what kosher means but expects a great meal, and

the treatment you get will fall somewhere between celebrity and royalty. The

only things you really should know about "kosher" before you go in are these:

-- Some meats will not be available. Those that are offered will be in the group of

beef, chicken, turkey, lamb, or bison ... maybe not all of these, but for sure no others.

In particular, no pork products will be available. But you knew that.

-- Your choices of 'seafood' will be similarly limited. Perhaps the best way to describe

it is to say that any fish available will be a fish that looks like a fish; they won't include

anything with shells or claws.

-- If your order centers around a meat item, then you shouldn't expect to also have

something that involves milk ... cheese, cream in your coffee, etc. Conversely, if your

order centers around an item that contains milk, then you should expect to conclude

your meal without meat. Depending on the individual restaurant, it's possible that

meat items and milk items might not even be available in the same seating area,

or in the same room.

In your question, you asked what I would order. Personally, in the place where

my son works the counter, I would order either the Italian beef sandwich or

the barbecued rib-eye with steamed vegetables. This is the one decision that

nobody can help you with. Today's Jews come from nearly 140 different countries,

and have brought with them the cuisine and flavor of every one. There are plenty

of Jews for whom the flavor and 'style' in which other Jews cook and eat is unpleasant.

All we can recommend is: Read the menu, ask for suggestions, and enjoy.